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Ex Men

Today I am thankful for Ex Men.
 
 
I give up. 
 
 
Men are driving me crazy. 
  
My crush doubly so. 
 
If he wants to get laid, why is he bringing the matter up on Facebook using innuendo. 
 
I'm a physical suggestible.  Innuendo won't work nearly as well and buying porn and telling me.....

"I want to DO that to YOU!" 
 
Sigh.....
 
I use innuendo to test the matter.  He ignores it.  He's not interested. 
 
He wasn't interested in watching me suck a round headed lollipop. 

He didn't want me mailing him a blue ribbon.
 
I figured it wasn't his type of thing. 
 
Please don't complain publicly about the road being closed. 

Call me.  Ask me.  Try to plant one on me. 
 
There's always next weekend.  I don't have b-day plans.


 
My crush used a football metaphor. 

So, the stalker ex spent the afternoon trying to explain football to me. 

Look, he's always around.  I may as well get some insight out of him. 

Yeah...I'm working on ditching him. 
 
My stalker ex told me about tight ends. 
 
Apparently, I'm not thinking the same thing he is when he says that phrase. 
 
He told me about defensive ends. 
 
Are there offensive ends? 

Trust me, they exist in real life.  That is why I carry air deodorizer.
 
 
Football reminds me of a gigantic orgy. 
 
You've got men climbing around, all over, and atop each other.
 
It's like a gay man's fantasy come true.
 
 
I don't understand football. 
 
 
I don't want to.
 
 
Football is the one thing separating the sexes. 
 
 
It ensures that men have time for male bonding. 
 
 
It gives me time away from men to shop for shoes. 
 
 
Men get football time. 
 
 
I get shoe time. 
 
 
It's all good. 
 
*****
 
 
One of my exes is a rancher. 
 
 
The other is a gardener. 
 
 
I should go bug them for a little while.  Heck, I could get them together and have a decent meal. 
 
 
Just teasing......
 
 
I know that I'd rather be alone. 
 

It's a good thing I'm on a diet. 
 
****
 
 
I'm looking for a job, a car, an apartment, and a new mediator.  I really don't have time for mind games. 
 
Now, if someone wants to help me christen my new office, apartment, or soon to be vehicle, that's okay by me.  
 
Love ya,
 
 
S. 


Edit:  I think I'm tired of this. 

Maybe romance isn't worth it unless I can find an emotional suggestible that I can actually communicate with. 



 
 
 
 


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