A man can no more diminish God's glory by refusing to worship Him than a lunatic can put out the sun by scribbling the word 'darkness' on the walls of his cell.
― C.S. Lewis, The Problem of Pain
According to the media, there was another domestic violence related murder near my office this morning. A 29 year old police officer was murdered. Five other peace officers were shot.
The gunman (who does not deserve to be named) claimed to be a Libertarian.
If he was, he wasn't active in the party.
If he was, he wasn't active in the party.
I left the party just about two years ago because it was being infiltrated by Republicans who don't play well with others. Libertarians are fiscally conservative (meaning focused on personal responsibility) and socially liberal (do what ye will with harm to none).
The themes of fiscal responsibility and social freedom sit well with my Pagan faith.
The problem is that most Republicans are not socially liberal. The bad apples that joined our party started attacking women (for having abortions, or giving speeches and complaining about sexual harassment). I had run ins with a couple of them.
They made me laugh. I typically used covert hypnosis to get out of conversations with them. There were times when they called my house (especially if I made the newspaper) and I'd let them get worked up into a lather and I'd hang up on them. Apparently, they were jealous that I could get press so easily.
My bad....
In 2015, a faction of the party in Florida started to harass a man who was Pagan. They went to numerous newspapers and claimed he was mentally ill. I went to the Way Back Machine and saw that the leadership of this faction did this around 2010 to someone else who wanted to run for the same seat as the chairman of the state party. I went to the head of the party and he said that Florida is going to do what Florida does.
They gave covert approval to the shenanigans by their failure to stand up to the chairman.
They gave covert approval to the shenanigans by their failure to stand up to the chairman.
I left the party I late 2015.
I still keep in touch. I do go to events but I don't publicize it anymore. Stalking has a way of keeping me mum about my activities.
This guy....this crazy asshole who shot a young police officer in cold blood.....wrote numerous times that he was a Libertarian.
I've never seen him.
The best way to meet most of the active Libertarians in the country is to volunteer to work the events. Few people volunteer. I did. It always put me front and center. I met some great people that way.
I know that is why my CCW was paid for. Acquaintances heard I was being stalked and put me in a shooting class.
I got two certificates of completion. For a couple of years, one was hung by the front door to ward off my ex-husband's family from breaking into my home. The police didn't want to do anything. They thought of stalking as a joke. The police also refused to take police reports because they claimed DA George Brauchler wouldn't prosecute stalking cases. Of course, without a police report, I couldn't get a permanent restraining order.
I stopped saving emails and proof of hacking. I stopped collecting evidence.
I stopped saving emails and proof of hacking. I stopped collecting evidence.
It was up to me to draw the line in the sand.
A gun did that for me.
A gun did that for me.
Spending $10,000 on legal fees to get my ex-husband out of my home, helped a little. I still get hacked. There is still property damage but, at least, my computer hardware doesn't get destroyed anymore.
We have to go to crazy lengths to protect ourselves from crazy people.
Just because one holds a delusion, does not mean that we have to buy into his or her warped realities.
This guy seems a tad bit warped.
*******
There are a-holes in every party who don't understand that reporters, politicians and police officers are people, too.
They are doing what they believe is in the best interest of the community. Most often, they are not trying to take power over people for the sake of lording power over others. They often mistakenly think that control is the best way to keep the peace.
In many religions, that is the difference between Jesus and Satan. Jesus rules by free will and love. He allows us to make mistakes for which we are easily forgiven. Jesus, to me, would be an Anarchist.
Satan wanted to rule with an iron fist. In my mind, Satan would be a Communist.
In many religions, that is the difference between Jesus and Satan. Jesus rules by free will and love. He allows us to make mistakes for which we are easily forgiven. Jesus, to me, would be an Anarchist.
Satan wanted to rule with an iron fist. In my mind, Satan would be a Communist.
They say that the path to hell is paved by good intentions.
The people who think that more rules are going to make everything rosy are mistaken. They just need a good history lesson.
Too many rules and too much gun control leads to genocide. Think of Pinochet. Think of Stalin. Think of Zedong. Don't forget the Khmar Rouge. We will never forget Hitler.
The Democrats (and many Republicans) don't know what they are asking.
They using this tragedy to push for more gun control.
They refuse to answer the question that I have posed many times.
"How should a stalking victim protect herself when the police refuse to come?"
I never got an answer. I was told by numerous female Democrat senators that a gun will only increase the likelihood of my stalker shooting me.
My ex-husband's sister was a security guard. She had a gun whether I had one or not.
The only thing keeping me safe was the fact they didn't know if I were crazy enough to shoot.
Sigh.....
******
I have thought about returning to the Libertarian Party. I probably won't.
The few nutty people ruin it for everyone else.
The guy that murdered the police officer claimed to be considering a run for the office of Sheriff.
He didn't stand a chance. People want Sheriffs that have a background in law enforcement.
I haven't looked at the shooter's YouTube page to try to get into his head. I might. I probably won't.
It would only give insight into this guy's issue. One would have to read numerous manifestos from numerous murderous a-holes to try to find an overarching theme.
Maybe there is a common thread? Maybe not. I don't know if I have it in me to try to figure it out.
This guy just seemed angry. He obviously hadn't had much contact with the Sheriffs.
In fact, when the cops wouldn't help me with the stalking, two Sheriffs stepped in with advice that saved the kids and I.
They have my respect. They even banded together to fight unfair gun control laws in 2013. The Sheriffs know they can't be everywhere and urge people to take responsibility for their own safety.
******
The offices I run for do not require a party endorsement. If I wanted to be a Senator or Congressperson, I'd need that (unless I wanted to collect several thousand signatures).
The government isn't the be all and end all organization of knowledge. The government consists of fallible people with a limited scope of knowledge.
On a personal level, I feel the urge to try to teach the local City Council about sociology. Many of the rules in this town are archaic and do not reflect the latest in social science practice (going back to the 80's). When I share this research with the City Manager's office, they don't understand what I'm trying to say.
Either they're daft or they don't care. Maybe I need to put together a PowerPoint.
The last issue pertained to what constitutes a household. The city evicted a family headed by a disabled veteran because there was one too many people in the household.
Since the 80's, most jurisdictions consider a family unit to be one that shares expenses. In fact, in the three counties that encompass the city, people who share food are considered a part of the same family unit and can get food stamps based on the size of the family unit.
The city counts individuals related by blood or marriage as a family unit. Back in the day, if a man and woman lived together for six months and presented themselves as husband and wife, they were considered married. Decades ago, if you lived with a person of the same sex or a different race, you were not considered married.
That rule is a throwback to the days when homosexuals and racial minorities were persecuted. If only related people could live together and gay and biracial marriage were illegal, people who chose to live lifestyles that were considered unconventional at the time could be kicked out of there homes.
If you unconventionally married a person of color, your spouse would be evicted from your home by the government under these rules. It was same if you considered yourself married to a person of the same sex.
I think it's time we changed that.
The veteran, his wife and two children found a new home. They are staying with a family friend (outside of the city). The Gods were gracious to them. They don't have to pay rent.
They were lucky.
This kind of thing goes on under our noses. We have a City Council who needs educated so they can make better decisions. I think they are trying to do the right things. I don't think they are necessarily trying to mess up people's lives. I think they are trying to come up with win-win situations (in some cases, they want to personally profit from the changes they make).
I always wanted to be a social psychologist and conduct research. They are homemakers, public servants, realtors, bankers, and developers....they don't have my background. I don't have their backgrounds.
People can learn from each other.
Well....if they opened up their ears and paid attention to the experience of the thousands of citizens in this community.....we could have a better city.
Maybe that's the challenge.....finding a way to solicit the feedback and narrow it down to usable data. Maybe they should solicit feedback and run it through qualitative software.
The point is that it is understandable why people get angry with the government. They set high expectations but will always undoubtedly fail someone due to their fallibility.
This is usually why some people are angry at the government - they have unmet expectations.
*****
There appears to be a link between domestic violence and mass shootings.
The shooter had a history of online anti-government rants. He wasn't the only violent offender who complained about the government.
Why do people blame the government when things go wrong in their personal lives?
Could it be because the government takes far too much power but they lack the resources and expertise required to solve the problems?
Irresponsible people want someone else to solve their problems for them.
Is that why these people blame the government? They have high expectations for the people in power and are angry when they inevitably let them down?
I don't know.
I'll need to ponder that. Maybe the idiot's YouTube channel will give me answers. It's hard for me to want to give the jack-nuts any time and attention. Maybe if it saves others, it's worth it.
Right now, the officers' families need our time and attention.
Initially, news stories claimed it was a domestic disturbance. It doesn't seem to be the case now. Maybe as more information reveals itself, more insight into this idiot's motives will make themselves known. As of now, some news stories state that he was involved in a domestic dispute with a man.
Domestic violence cuts through all sexes and types of relationships.
It seems that aanger at the government is a common thread among abusers. I have met a few activists (some very liberal) who were pissed at the government because they couldn't beat their wives.
I wish I were joking.
This guy seemed clueless. I don't know if running for Sheriff would change much. Sheriffs only enforce the laws that are in place. One would think that to change the law, one would want to influence how they are written.
What I do know is that the best change starts from the bottom and works it's way up. That is why I am drawn to local politics.
Local politics is non-partisan.
I don't need the Libertarian Party. They are the closest to my personal ideology.
The nut jobs ruin my motivation to help the party. The lack of understanding of social issues ruins government.
It's sad.
We don't need to be a part of a political party to change our communities.
******
I'm trying to make sense of this.
This is hitting close to home for me.
I really wish more police officers, DAs, social workers and government officials understood controlling personalities. I wish they understood domestic violence.
I think if they understood it, fewer of them would get shot.
Domestic calls are the most dangerous for first responders. Abusers believe that they have the right to abuse and control others. They will employ any tactic that enables them to keep this control.
In sum, domestic violence is all about control.
Abusers panic when they sense they are losing the control they've worked so hard to get and maintain.
Most abusers are male because they were raised to believe in privilege and the right of men to have power over their lovers and children. their masculinity gives them a sense of entitlement over the freedom of others. Curiously, it is the same for female abusers. They feel that, as women, they are entitled to control their lover's lives and kids.
It is said that the individual with the most flexibility has the most control. It is hard to imagine the sheer flexibility of an abuser until you experience it. The rules can change in an instant. The moment they feel their control slipping away, they switch gears, they switch behaviors...they can seem different in just a heartbeat. This is why many victims tend to question their experience.
Abusers of both sexes often use a self-created victimhood as an excuse to hit, steal or harass their lovers.
It is almost like abusers use the same playbook.
People claim coercive control and domestic violence are a mental health matter. No, it is a learned behavior that was created by life experiences and a faulty belief system.
Abusers are manipulative and slick. They believe they are entitled to what they want at any cost.
I've heard time and time again that "all is fair in love and war."
That does seem to be their mantra. They honestly believe they have a right to abuse. If we take that perceived right away, they behave as if they are victims.
How dare we set boundaries with abusers?
These ass-hats will go so far as to use the State to further their agenda.
That's a problem. Taxpayers are paying to feed the delusion that these people deserve control.
Abusers can convince a judge, lawyers, social workers and cops that they are victims.
I have recently seen how they can convince social workers that they are poor and unable to work and should be stripped of any responsibility to pay child support**.
Police officers, judges and social workers get frustrated because of the game. Abusers will lie: they'll throw anything at their victims in the hopes that something will stick and give them the upper hand. It can be difficult to try to sort out the lies from the truth.
The victims are usually crying and shaking. The abusers are calm and collected (in fact, there studies that show that many of these people actually experience blood pressure drops in times of stress). It's hard to tell who is being honest and just what the truth is. Far too often, the decision makers just take a stab in the dark and guess at the truth.
Usually the liar with the calm demeanor wins. Abusers tend to get custody. Victims often get arrested.
Cops, judges and social workers need educated. They must stop coddling and colluding with abusers.
I'm shocked my ex got away with not having to pay child support for the next 2 1/4 years. I'm sad that taxpayers paid for his housing, the clothes he is wearing and his three lawyers**.
I refused to give him the money to make the payment on his storage facility. The State of Colorado claimed he had nothing. I didn't want to help my ex hide his stuff from the state. If that is any conciliation, someone will profit from the things he was hiding from the state in order to pretend to be insolvent. When people don't pay the rent on their storage facilities, the operator can auction the contents.
If my ex doesn't pay child support, maybe he'll stay away. Maybe the stalking will stop. Maybe.....none of my neighbors will never have to call the police to my door
So many other people are fighting losing battles with abusive Cluster Bs. The only thing that will help is education. As it stands, they win because the rest of us don't understand how slippery these eels are! They are also quite flexible in what they are willing to do to win their battles.
The government enables abusers. I don't think they mean to do that. I just don't think they know what they are doing.
It's heartbreaking when an abuser murders a government officer trying to do the right thing.
******
There is a reason I am writing this right now is that it is resonating with me and not in a good way at all.
Two days ago, our 19 year old came to me with her father's worrisome Facebook feed. She wants to unfriend him due to the anti-government rhetoric.
I laughed.
I shouldn't have laughed.
I thought it was funny. This former Libertarian and alleged member of the Constitution Party used the government to break a private contract to pay child support.
It's hard to imagine him being angry at the government: One would think he ought to be grateful!
They paid for his lawyers. He put me in debt to the tune of $4,000 in legal fees (because the State told me to get a lawyer). By not paying child support, he is limiting my options for survival and the children's options for medical care and education.
The state, in the form of CO-PEP, enabled our abuser to maintain control**.
The freedom to skate away from responsibility towards one's children is not in the Constitution! Where is it written that the taxpayers should pay for their children's food, housing and medical expenses?
That is why I am looking for a third job.
At least I have principles!
I would think my ex would worship the government rather than threaten them! They gave him the control he desired. They've paid for his housing, clothing, medical and food for over a year. They opted him out of child support. They didn't even check some of their facts before they rolled over me - full steam ahead!
They ignored his pay stubs and claimed he could only make $12 an hour. They didn't check on the note he provided to the court nor did they check to see if he had any property.
Yeah......I am researching the Federal Parent Employment project rules. It would seem that Arapahoe County isn't following them**. I wonder where I should report the issue?
After what happened today, I am concerned. No one wants a repeat.
My ex-husband is an abuser.
He has gotten away with stalking, harassment and theft. The government even helped him skate away from a financial responsibility that is, supposedly, unavoidable.
My ex....well.....he is being.....rewarded for his irresponsible behavior.
Now, he is posting anti-government rhetoric?
I don't understand why.
He got what he wanted!
Why would he be angry at the government?
With the threats, I wonder....is anyone in danger?
I have concerns that he is going to act on his threats.
I'll do my part. I'll work on fixing my financial situation. If I don't ask for money from him, maybe he'll move along and leave us alone. Maybe he'll be satisfied enough to keep a low profile and only post threats to Facebook.
Maybe if I keep my ex happy, no one else will be hurt.
******
The lesson is that crazy people always win by virtue of their craziness.
Just let them take the crap they want and get thee away. They don't live in our reality.
They have faulty beliefs.
Just because a lunatic espouses a belief, does not make that belief rooted in reality.
Let them live in their sniveling whining personal hell.....fighting their own personal little wars. They are vampires who feast on the negative energy of drama.
Nothing will make them happy. As sad as it sounds, all we can do is get away. Until the powers that be understand that there are liars in our midst, we will never win against any abuser.
Our job is to live the best life we can.
Shine....if you can....shine to be a beacon for others.
*******
All those years of letting Michael get away with the stalking may have emboldened him to get more violent. Helping him escape child support has probably further emboldened him.
**I am learning that Arapahoe County Child Support Enforcement should have provided my ex with a case manager and an action plan. There should have also been a referral to a professional to help us deal with the domestic violence issues. The thought process is that dealing with these issues will further his ability to work and visit the children. Arapahoe County and the State of Colorado just put him in a voluntary rehab program for 27 months and gut his child support. Despite what the State says, there is no way my ex can pay a dime if he's in a voluntary rehab program that won't allow him to work. Before rehab, he was about $48,000 in arrears (not including the judgements I have due to the money he stole from our retirement after the divorce).
If those numbers climb due to the state mandated 12% compounded interest laws, we are probably all in danger. Without domestic violence treatment, my ex will continue to blame me for the problems in his life. If he's as suicidal as he told me he is, what would stop him from taking me and the kids out?
Yeah.....I'm thinking that I should just let this guy win this round and I'll start sharing the legal filings with local lawmakers. CO-PEP needs defunded before they get someone killed.
Yeah....I AM frightened for whoever he is blaming for his life. It appears he is blaming the government.
He seems angry.
My understanding is that he is in a voluntary rehab facility. He can leave at any time.
I hope he is arrested the next time he menaces someone.
Don't give people like this any more chances. Stop giving abusers the benefit of the doubt.
Oh, and stalkers tend to escalate. To the police department, I say stop making excuses not to take police reports. The life you save could be your own or one of a colleagues.
The shooter probably had run-ins with the police before. If so, had it been handled differently, two young children would still have their father.
Yeah, I did read that this joker did not have a criminal record. That does NOT mean he hasn't had police contract. Remember the police don't take reports for stalking and other forms of domestic violence. My ex and his sister do not have criminal records either. I guarantee that if I wind up blue and six feet under, the press will uncover a plethora of police calls to officers in my home city as well as the areas where I worked.
Cops don't take stalking reports because DAs don't prosecute!
The lives they could save could be there own!
Educate yourselves and THINK!
If I get over my anger enough to give this a-hole ghost my time and attention, I'll write about what I find in his online rants.
Right now, I'll do prosperity spells for the fallen officer's family.
Love ya lots,
S.
******
I have thought about returning to the Libertarian Party. I probably won't.
The few nutty people ruin it for everyone else.
The guy that murdered the police officer claimed to be considering a run for the office of Sheriff.
He didn't stand a chance. People want Sheriffs that have a background in law enforcement.
I haven't looked at the shooter's YouTube page to try to get into his head. I might. I probably won't.
It would only give insight into this guy's issue. One would have to read numerous manifestos from numerous murderous a-holes to try to find an overarching theme.
Maybe there is a common thread? Maybe not. I don't know if I have it in me to try to figure it out.
This guy just seemed angry. He obviously hadn't had much contact with the Sheriffs.
In fact, when the cops wouldn't help me with the stalking, two Sheriffs stepped in with advice that saved the kids and I.
They have my respect. They even banded together to fight unfair gun control laws in 2013. The Sheriffs know they can't be everywhere and urge people to take responsibility for their own safety.
******
The offices I run for do not require a party endorsement. If I wanted to be a Senator or Congressperson, I'd need that (unless I wanted to collect several thousand signatures).
The government isn't the be all and end all organization of knowledge. The government consists of fallible people with a limited scope of knowledge.
On a personal level, I feel the urge to try to teach the local City Council about sociology. Many of the rules in this town are archaic and do not reflect the latest in social science practice (going back to the 80's). When I share this research with the City Manager's office, they don't understand what I'm trying to say.
Either they're daft or they don't care. Maybe I need to put together a PowerPoint.
The last issue pertained to what constitutes a household. The city evicted a family headed by a disabled veteran because there was one too many people in the household.
Since the 80's, most jurisdictions consider a family unit to be one that shares expenses. In fact, in the three counties that encompass the city, people who share food are considered a part of the same family unit and can get food stamps based on the size of the family unit.
The city counts individuals related by blood or marriage as a family unit. Back in the day, if a man and woman lived together for six months and presented themselves as husband and wife, they were considered married. Decades ago, if you lived with a person of the same sex or a different race, you were not considered married.
That rule is a throwback to the days when homosexuals and racial minorities were persecuted. If only related people could live together and gay and biracial marriage were illegal, people who chose to live lifestyles that were considered unconventional at the time could be kicked out of there homes.
If you unconventionally married a person of color, your spouse would be evicted from your home by the government under these rules. It was same if you considered yourself married to a person of the same sex.
I think it's time we changed that.
The veteran, his wife and two children found a new home. They are staying with a family friend (outside of the city). The Gods were gracious to them. They don't have to pay rent.
They were lucky.
This kind of thing goes on under our noses. We have a City Council who needs educated so they can make better decisions. I think they are trying to do the right things. I don't think they are necessarily trying to mess up people's lives. I think they are trying to come up with win-win situations (in some cases, they want to personally profit from the changes they make).
I always wanted to be a social psychologist and conduct research. They are homemakers, public servants, realtors, bankers, and developers....they don't have my background. I don't have their backgrounds.
People can learn from each other.
Well....if they opened up their ears and paid attention to the experience of the thousands of citizens in this community.....we could have a better city.
Maybe that's the challenge.....finding a way to solicit the feedback and narrow it down to usable data. Maybe they should solicit feedback and run it through qualitative software.
The point is that it is understandable why people get angry with the government. They set high expectations but will always undoubtedly fail someone due to their fallibility.
This is usually why some people are angry at the government - they have unmet expectations.
*****
There appears to be a link between domestic violence and mass shootings.
The shooter had a history of online anti-government rants. He wasn't the only violent offender who complained about the government.
Why do people blame the government when things go wrong in their personal lives?
Could it be because the government takes far too much power but they lack the resources and expertise required to solve the problems?
Irresponsible people want someone else to solve their problems for them.
Is that why these people blame the government? They have high expectations for the people in power and are angry when they inevitably let them down?
I don't know.
I'll need to ponder that. Maybe the idiot's YouTube channel will give me answers. It's hard for me to want to give the jack-nuts any time and attention. Maybe if it saves others, it's worth it.
Right now, the officers' families need our time and attention.
Initially, news stories claimed it was a domestic disturbance. It doesn't seem to be the case now. Maybe as more information reveals itself, more insight into this idiot's motives will make themselves known. As of now, some news stories state that he was involved in a domestic dispute with a man.
Domestic violence cuts through all sexes and types of relationships.
It seems that aanger at the government is a common thread among abusers. I have met a few activists (some very liberal) who were pissed at the government because they couldn't beat their wives.
I wish I were joking.
This guy seemed clueless. I don't know if running for Sheriff would change much. Sheriffs only enforce the laws that are in place. One would think that to change the law, one would want to influence how they are written.
What I do know is that the best change starts from the bottom and works it's way up. That is why I am drawn to local politics.
Local politics is non-partisan.
I don't need the Libertarian Party. They are the closest to my personal ideology.
The nut jobs ruin my motivation to help the party. The lack of understanding of social issues ruins government.
It's sad.
We don't need to be a part of a political party to change our communities.
******
I'm trying to make sense of this.
This is hitting close to home for me.
I really wish more police officers, DAs, social workers and government officials understood controlling personalities. I wish they understood domestic violence.
I think if they understood it, fewer of them would get shot.
Domestic calls are the most dangerous for first responders. Abusers believe that they have the right to abuse and control others. They will employ any tactic that enables them to keep this control.
In sum, domestic violence is all about control.
Abusers panic when they sense they are losing the control they've worked so hard to get and maintain.
Most abusers are male because they were raised to believe in privilege and the right of men to have power over their lovers and children. their masculinity gives them a sense of entitlement over the freedom of others. Curiously, it is the same for female abusers. They feel that, as women, they are entitled to control their lover's lives and kids.
It is said that the individual with the most flexibility has the most control. It is hard to imagine the sheer flexibility of an abuser until you experience it. The rules can change in an instant. The moment they feel their control slipping away, they switch gears, they switch behaviors...they can seem different in just a heartbeat. This is why many victims tend to question their experience.
Abusers of both sexes often use a self-created victimhood as an excuse to hit, steal or harass their lovers.
It is almost like abusers use the same playbook.
People claim coercive control and domestic violence are a mental health matter. No, it is a learned behavior that was created by life experiences and a faulty belief system.
Abusers are manipulative and slick. They believe they are entitled to what they want at any cost.
I've heard time and time again that "all is fair in love and war."
That does seem to be their mantra. They honestly believe they have a right to abuse. If we take that perceived right away, they behave as if they are victims.
How dare we set boundaries with abusers?
These ass-hats will go so far as to use the State to further their agenda.
That's a problem. Taxpayers are paying to feed the delusion that these people deserve control.
Abusers can convince a judge, lawyers, social workers and cops that they are victims.
I have recently seen how they can convince social workers that they are poor and unable to work and should be stripped of any responsibility to pay child support**.
Police officers, judges and social workers get frustrated because of the game. Abusers will lie: they'll throw anything at their victims in the hopes that something will stick and give them the upper hand. It can be difficult to try to sort out the lies from the truth.
The victims are usually crying and shaking. The abusers are calm and collected (in fact, there studies that show that many of these people actually experience blood pressure drops in times of stress). It's hard to tell who is being honest and just what the truth is. Far too often, the decision makers just take a stab in the dark and guess at the truth.
Usually the liar with the calm demeanor wins. Abusers tend to get custody. Victims often get arrested.
Cops, judges and social workers need educated. They must stop coddling and colluding with abusers.
I'm shocked my ex got away with not having to pay child support for the next 2 1/4 years. I'm sad that taxpayers paid for his housing, the clothes he is wearing and his three lawyers**.
I refused to give him the money to make the payment on his storage facility. The State of Colorado claimed he had nothing. I didn't want to help my ex hide his stuff from the state. If that is any conciliation, someone will profit from the things he was hiding from the state in order to pretend to be insolvent. When people don't pay the rent on their storage facilities, the operator can auction the contents.
If my ex doesn't pay child support, maybe he'll stay away. Maybe the stalking will stop. Maybe.....none of my neighbors will never have to call the police to my door
I have a new appreciation for how dangerous calling the police can be. I don't know how I'd feel if someone the same age as my eldest daughter died on my lawn because of my ex.
Perhaps if I stay out of his line of sight by avoiding child support, the stalking will be a thing of the past for us. It would be nice to advertise my business, feel safe taking evening strolls or even let the kids walk to school again.
Perhaps if I stay out of his line of sight by avoiding child support, the stalking will be a thing of the past for us. It would be nice to advertise my business, feel safe taking evening strolls or even let the kids walk to school again.
So many other people are fighting losing battles with abusive Cluster Bs. The only thing that will help is education. As it stands, they win because the rest of us don't understand how slippery these eels are! They are also quite flexible in what they are willing to do to win their battles.
The government enables abusers. I don't think they mean to do that. I just don't think they know what they are doing.
It's heartbreaking when an abuser murders a government officer trying to do the right thing.
******
There is a reason I am writing this right now is that it is resonating with me and not in a good way at all.
Two days ago, our 19 year old came to me with her father's worrisome Facebook feed. She wants to unfriend him due to the anti-government rhetoric.
I laughed.
I shouldn't have laughed.
I thought it was funny. This former Libertarian and alleged member of the Constitution Party used the government to break a private contract to pay child support.
It's hard to imagine him being angry at the government: One would think he ought to be grateful!
They paid for his lawyers. He put me in debt to the tune of $4,000 in legal fees (because the State told me to get a lawyer). By not paying child support, he is limiting my options for survival and the children's options for medical care and education.
The state, in the form of CO-PEP, enabled our abuser to maintain control**.
The freedom to skate away from responsibility towards one's children is not in the Constitution! Where is it written that the taxpayers should pay for their children's food, housing and medical expenses?
That is why I am looking for a third job.
At least I have principles!
I would think my ex would worship the government rather than threaten them! They gave him the control he desired. They've paid for his housing, clothing, medical and food for over a year. They opted him out of child support. They didn't even check some of their facts before they rolled over me - full steam ahead!
They ignored his pay stubs and claimed he could only make $12 an hour. They didn't check on the note he provided to the court nor did they check to see if he had any property.
Yeah......I am researching the Federal Parent Employment project rules. It would seem that Arapahoe County isn't following them**. I wonder where I should report the issue?
After what happened today, I am concerned. No one wants a repeat.
My ex-husband is an abuser.
He has gotten away with stalking, harassment and theft. The government even helped him skate away from a financial responsibility that is, supposedly, unavoidable.
My ex....well.....he is being.....rewarded for his irresponsible behavior.
Now, he is posting anti-government rhetoric?
I don't understand why.
He got what he wanted!
Why would he be angry at the government?
With the threats, I wonder....is anyone in danger?
I have concerns that he is going to act on his threats.
I'll do my part. I'll work on fixing my financial situation. If I don't ask for money from him, maybe he'll move along and leave us alone. Maybe he'll be satisfied enough to keep a low profile and only post threats to Facebook.
Maybe if I keep my ex happy, no one else will be hurt.
******
The lesson is that crazy people always win by virtue of their craziness.
Just let them take the crap they want and get thee away. They don't live in our reality.
They have faulty beliefs.
Just because a lunatic espouses a belief, does not make that belief rooted in reality.
Let them live in their sniveling whining personal hell.....fighting their own personal little wars. They are vampires who feast on the negative energy of drama.
Nothing will make them happy. As sad as it sounds, all we can do is get away. Until the powers that be understand that there are liars in our midst, we will never win against any abuser.
Our job is to live the best life we can.
Shine....if you can....shine to be a beacon for others.
*******
All those years of letting Michael get away with the stalking may have emboldened him to get more violent. Helping him escape child support has probably further emboldened him.
**I am learning that Arapahoe County Child Support Enforcement should have provided my ex with a case manager and an action plan. There should have also been a referral to a professional to help us deal with the domestic violence issues. The thought process is that dealing with these issues will further his ability to work and visit the children. Arapahoe County and the State of Colorado just put him in a voluntary rehab program for 27 months and gut his child support. Despite what the State says, there is no way my ex can pay a dime if he's in a voluntary rehab program that won't allow him to work. Before rehab, he was about $48,000 in arrears (not including the judgements I have due to the money he stole from our retirement after the divorce).
If those numbers climb due to the state mandated 12% compounded interest laws, we are probably all in danger. Without domestic violence treatment, my ex will continue to blame me for the problems in his life. If he's as suicidal as he told me he is, what would stop him from taking me and the kids out?
Yeah.....I'm thinking that I should just let this guy win this round and I'll start sharing the legal filings with local lawmakers. CO-PEP needs defunded before they get someone killed.
Yeah....I AM frightened for whoever he is blaming for his life. It appears he is blaming the government.
He seems angry.
My understanding is that he is in a voluntary rehab facility. He can leave at any time.
I hope he is arrested the next time he menaces someone.
Don't give people like this any more chances. Stop giving abusers the benefit of the doubt.
Oh, and stalkers tend to escalate. To the police department, I say stop making excuses not to take police reports. The life you save could be your own or one of a colleagues.
The shooter probably had run-ins with the police before. If so, had it been handled differently, two young children would still have their father.
Yeah, I did read that this joker did not have a criminal record. That does NOT mean he hasn't had police contract. Remember the police don't take reports for stalking and other forms of domestic violence. My ex and his sister do not have criminal records either. I guarantee that if I wind up blue and six feet under, the press will uncover a plethora of police calls to officers in my home city as well as the areas where I worked.
Cops don't take stalking reports because DAs don't prosecute!
The lives they could save could be there own!
Educate yourselves and THINK!
If I get over my anger enough to give this a-hole ghost my time and attention, I'll write about what I find in his online rants.
Right now, I'll do prosperity spells for the fallen officer's family.
Love ya lots,
S.
