More Documentation of an Ex's Escalation

Today I am thankful for intuition.

Right now, I'm realizing that things are ramping up.

In the past, whenever I wasn't perceived as a "good", "quiet", "subservient", "girl", I would up being stalked.

Typically, the harassment begins in clusters.  Much of it is not illegal but the scary stuff is.

In the past six months,

my ex has decided to visit the kids (hooray),

but used setting up the visits as a means to emotionally abuse me by calling me every name in the book and state that I'm lying about the stalking I've endured from his family since 1992 (boo),

now, he's messing around with visitation times.  This I predicted.  I feared being open and allowing for frequent changes to the visitation times because it would eventually lead to a situation where we are waiting around for him to show up EVERY weekend (even those times and weeks he's unscheduled to visit).

I've been a bit of a stick in the mud and have asked him to adhere to the times in the parenting agreement.  He's asked for a lot of slack and I've stated that I'm more than willing to pay a lawyer to rewrite the visitation schedule to be more appealing to him.

He cuts off communication at the point when I ask what he would like put down in writing.

The kids are telling me that after each visit, he'll tell them to plan on seeing him the next weekend (even though he doesn't have visitation every week).

Now.....last Friday (when he did not have visitation) he showed up at the door demanding that the kids go with him.  When they didn't answer the door, five minutes prior to 5:00 (visitation time begins at 5:00), he started "blowing up the phones" and sending a series of texts to them demanding that they open the door.

The 18 year old responded that it was the fourth Friday in June.  Visitation typically takes place weeks 1, 3 and 5.

He continued to harangue her by insisting it was the fifth week and that he was entitled to see her (not a good parenting trick, especially with older kids).

 I was at work at the time.  The kids don't know what else to do except to go with him.

Mind you, I don't mind his visitation.

This issue is that we have lives.  Children need structure. The children have school and art activities.  It would be nice to know what to plan for and to ensure we are here for him.  This is why I'd like it in writing (to protect us both) until such time that we can communicate without the texts that look as though they were authored by a psychopathic drunken sailor.

This comes 8 days after an attempted break-in

And 12 days after he asked me to change up the visitation schedule but refused to discuss putting it in writing.

Three weeks ago, he failed to show up for a visit and claimed that he forgot.

Twenty-five days ago, I asked if he was going to put the children on health insurance in order to comply with the court order.  He stated that he could not afford it.

Part of me is thinking that the latest round of harassment is due to my asking him about health care costs.

I'm thinking of taking him to court to revisit child support after I was duped into dropping it.  The state of Colorado sent me a letter claiming that my ex was a homeless alcoholic and demanded that I drop his child support.  Now, that he wants visitation, I am told that he wasn't homeless and never had a substance use disorder.

I was duped.

After Friday, I wonder...…maybe he drinks?  To be quite honest, I work with alcoholics.  Many of whom are seemingly lucid despite blowing a 2.5 or higher.

Do I have to hang a calendar outside of my door?

Hopefully the new security cams will suffice.

Something is off.  His behavior is escalating.  This coupled with the attempted break-in and demands for me to switch up visitation without a paper trail is scaring the shit out of me.

I'm going to take him to court.  While we are there, we can easily create a visitation plan that may suite my ex better.

I think some people just like conflict so they make it impossible to solve problems.

********

It's a shame that the contractors disconnected the security cameras.  I think they kept me safe.  Luckily, they put in security doors last week.

I'm proud of me - I have not lit one single black candle in nearly five years.

Now....I rethinking my stance on it.

*****
Now, there are a couple of things to mention if I wind up dead.

First, I thought it was a neighborhood issue.  My contractors are stating that the cops have been called on me numerous times due to parking of third parties in front of my neighbors' houses..

The police are not exactly stating that this hasn't happened but they're not confirming it either.  My local city councilman has offered to look into it (but he's busy, so....if I can solve the mystery on my own, I will).

The neighbors say they see cops outside of my home routinely.  I'm getting the sense from the police department that this is NOT happening.

I'm being told that Code Enforcement has been called and visiting the property.  The code enforcement guy has told me that this isn't the case.  Yeah, I'm livid that they evicted nice biker dudes who kept me safe from the stalker and now I deal with a freaky guy whose Rottweiler craps on my lawn.

I'd invest in sod if I could find a polite way to stop the crap from happening.

Our code enforcement guy isn't the problem.  The code is the problem.  I fear saying anything that will get this guy illegally fined by the city (yes, I've met yet another person harassed in that manner in the past three weeks....man....some people suck).

The security cameras are going back up.

In the past, my in-laws have had their friends (police officers from other jurisdictions) harass my neighbors and threaten me.

I'm wondering if the cops visiting the property are NOT Aurora or Arapahoe county cops.

It could simply be another phase in the harassment.

I'll solve the mystery.

I'm trying not to hot foot anybody until I know what the heck is going on.

It's probably my ex.

What are the odds that he's starting to flip out the exact same time as my house is getting broken into?

Especially with his history of stalking.

I'm betting it's my ex.

******

Oh - there is one thing.  I've noticed a man in the shadows every night  between 1:00 - 3:00 am.  I hear him dragging things.  He sets off the motion detector light across the street.

At 3:30 this morning, he was behind my vehicle.  It was parked in my driveway due to the construction equipment inside my garage.  .

I'm pretty sure he's the latest tenant in the slum property next door (16567) but am unsure.  The behavior is weird because he seems to be hiding from me when I go outside.

No one else in the neighborhood is complaining about a possible break-in, so I'm thinking it's my ex and his family.

It could just be a neighbor, too.

Whoever he is, he should smile.  He's now on Candid Camera.

Love,

S.

Edit 5:00 pm : Well, I found fecal matter rubbed on the garage door.

It is reading like harassment, isn't it?

Since I haven't yet mentioned the poop issue to the slum lord property owner, I doubt it's the neighbor.

Damn....

Well, rumor has it that I'm a black magick witch.

Now, I won't go into my spirituality here - I'm not into black magick or anything like that

-but-

I do know my way around the left hand path.

Let's just say,

the last thing you want to give an alleged witch is your DNA.

• Do not have sex with a witch you hate. 
• Do not smear shit on her house.
•  Do not comb your hair in her bathroom.
• Do not spit in her drink.   That includes bodily fluids - had some poor sap do that to my coffee years ago.  That poor man.
• Don't touch her door handle.
• Do not so much as breathe a curse in her direction.

The only thing worse to give a witch than your DNA, is your footprint or your picture.

If you're coming to my house, play nice.

Now, I possibly have an asshole's shit, his picture and his footprint.

It's a good thing I'm not as dark as the gossips make me out to be.

This could be a one person party.

Love ya,

S.

Another Dream of Lost Love

Today I am thankful that I'm sleeping, even if I am perplexed by the meaning of the dreams. 

So...I keep seeing the name "Tom" in the remnants of candles that I burn.

It makes me feel a little bit crazy and silly.  I've been trying to understand the meaning. 

Now, that said, my first love's name is Thomas.  I was allowed to call him "Tom."

I frequently have dreams of Tom.  

The dreams tend to give me a sense of what he currently looks like.  Over the past eleven years, we've met a few times.  The dreams tend to give a heads up so I can prepare to meet with my old friend. 

I dreamt of Tom again last night.

I'll do my best to describe it.

In this dream, I've packed up all of my belongings (my home and workplace are getting new carpet thus everything in my life is in storage....that's probably a reference to the changes occurring around me).

The boxes are behind me as I enter a room full of patients ready to do a group session.  We're not in a circle but in a classroom.

In the back, there is a tall man with dark hair, slumped in his chair, barely awake.

Another patient runs up to me and hands me a folded note from the man in the back.

The tired man's name is Tom.

I walk outside of the door to read the note in private.   I gently open the paper and it is colorful.  The background is pink (denoting friendship) and each word is encased in a square.

Each square is a different color.  The words combine to build a very colorful wall.

The beautiful wall, comprised of many colorful blocks, is incredibly sad.

I can barely remember the note, only the gist of it. 

In first person language, the author expressed frustration at the thought that I wouldn't want him to make any effort at being a friend - that I didn't believe that any effort, no matter how small, would benefit him in any way.

It went to say that he spent nearly $100 to track me down and buy me two lunches and coffee.  He was upset that I thought I wasn't worth that paltry sum.

The dream fades away as I fold the note and look back at the man slumped in the chair.

Note: Squares represent the physical world rather than the spiritual world.  The dream points to my own lack of self-worth as the reason for the distance between us.  

*****

I woke up perplexed. 

It's Friday, the day of Aphrodite. 

I didn't know what in the world was said to cause my subconcious mind to dream that message.

Then I realized what it was.....

I wrote that as a child, I didn't think I had anything special to offer to my friend. 

We were incredibly close 

-but-

I was the wrong version of his religion,

I was not very beautiful (although in his late thirties, he confided that he used to think I was "hot").

I was poor (he didn't know this but I was moving into my own apartment because I didn't have anywhere to live).

I was afraid of living my mother's life (as an alcoholic - yeah, that explains my career choice).

I loved him dearly.  I always felt he was like the better half of our relationship.  We were like a set of twins with him being blessed with the good looks, the wisdom and the talent.  I was the silly once with the temper but no necessary wisdom to make good use of my anger.  

I never thought I was what he wanted as I was too worried about the future and too melancholy over the death of my parents and grandmother.  

When he left me, I assumed it was because I didn't make him happy. 

I didn't realize that he left me so I could study music.  I found out about that 20 years later. 

There must be some guilt there. 

I do know that I'm old.  I'm fat.  I'm struggling.

Right now, I'm terrified to date anyone. 

Maybe I need to try to figure out my value. 

******

The candles and the dreams are causing me to try to understand what meaning that name has for me. 

Yes, I miss my friend.  I felt like a part of me died when he left. 

It'll all be worth it if I know he is happy.

That's all that matters - his happiness. 

I the meantime, I'll try to meditate.  It's possible that the name means something else to my subconscious mind.  

Love ya, 

S.  

Documentation

So.... I'm thankful for documentation.

Friday, May 31 at 3:32 pm (at Orchard and Parker) I drove past a man who looked my ex in an RTD mini-bus.  I thought I had to be mistaken because he doesn't work on Fridays.  That was the day my ex missed visitation.

On Tuesday,  June 2nd at 3:35 pm, I had the same experience.  So I changed things up.

I started taking a different route just in case.  I drove past the same driver on Parker Road (maybe 1 mile South of Arapahoe) at 3:41 p.m. yesterday.

Now, it could just be a doppelganger of my ex.  I wouldn't know for sure unless I heard him speak.

That said,

My ex is seemingly being kind.  He's telling me that he's too poor to follow court orders or help pay medical and insurance expenses on the kids so I'm on my own.  He's also wanting to change up the visitation times but drops the issue when I talk about getting the changes he wants signed off my a judge to protect us both.

He's being kind yet unwilling to help with meeting the kids' needs.  The bizarre thing about this is that when he lived here, he didn't care and was fairly emotionally abusive towards the kids.  When he was evicted, he went silent for about two years (I only heard from him when he wanted me to drop the child support).  Within the past six months, he's trying to appear to be the father of the year.

Yes, people change -but- I have to look at the motivation behind his behavior.  If it is coupled with some of the other crap, we may have a problem.

*****

My house is under construction.  All of the cameras have been removed.  We've got new locks on all the doors.  The door frames have been repaired and heavier doors put in place.

Last night, the children described something to me that I've lived so many times before.

As you read this story, remember that this has been going on in my life since January 1992.  This has played out with numerous dogs and numerous residences (including this one).

This is, sadly, something that the kids have endured as well.

Around 0036, our new dog ran to the top of the stairs barking and growling.  This dog has only barked twice in the 10 days we've had him.  He has never barked at me (even when I've come in through the doors).

The children heard a door close.  Then they heard keys entering the lock of the garage door leading into the house and think I'm home but the dog is now standing in front of the kids and growling loudly.

They call my workplace to see if I've left.  I answer the phone.

At this point, they're terrified.

They called the police (which I feel bad about because I don't like wasting taxpayer money).  The police confirm that the back door and garage doors were unlocked (they were locked when the contractors left).

In a phone conversation with me, the police officer asked if I own a Nissan.

I don't.  Neither do any of my neighbors.

I think my ex owns a Nissan but a different color than the one the officer described to me.

I inspected our brand new locks.  I found a couple of new scratches but they were no where near the barrel.  I don't use those doors, so I can't say that the locks are stickier than they used to be.

In the past when this happened, there would be damage to the door frame and the locks would often break.

I didn't notice any damage to the door frames.  There were a couple of items moved in the garage (a trash bucket and some paint) but nothing was missing.

*****
There is something else, too.  The rising garage door doesn't work.  It has a feature that when it is in use, a light will come on.  If one were to press a button on a remote, the light will turn on.

(I must've lost the remotes somewhere because I can't find them).

I've noticed this light coming on intermittently throughout the day.  The garage is filled with construction stuff so I'm not using it.

******

Finally, no one has repaired the electrical in the house yet.  Eight years ago, the ceiling fan above my bed stopped working.  You could hear power going into it but it never turned.

My ex told me in one of his rages that there was a spy camera in that ceiling fan recording me.  I assume he thought I was having an affair.

Yesterday, I bumped into the switch and this fan started to spin.

Could be nothing...…could be a bored contractor fixed it.....or maybe the "camera" handler, if the camera even existed, got sick of looking at my fat arse and moved the tech to a more beautiful scene.

There was one day when no one was home.  It was graduation day.

Someone could have entered the house then.

*******
I don't know.

Things are weird.

Documentation is a good thing.

Creepy men usually do creepier things to their succeeding victims.  If I keel over, I want to prevent another woman from the same fate.

Since the justice system likes crimes they can profit from (e.g. parking tickets, unfairly issued tickets to people with dementia and so on), I don't trust them to help with this issue.  Seriously....my ex is pretending to be poor.  He can't afford to pay fines or tickets.  He's manipulative and a good liar.  He'd just drain the system.

I'll look for another brand of justice that isn't going to be illegal.

*****

That said, there are devices that prevent deadbolts from turning.  I'm off to grab several now.

I don't think the stalking is over.

Sigh...

I miss my old biker neighbors who parked in front of the house without bitching about it and having people ticketed.

Man....can't believe the city had them evicted for having four cars and one extra person in their household (a disabled vet).

I remember the day they ran off a tall man with black hair who was trying to enter my home.  They said it wasn't my ex.

My ex often had his relatives harass me on his behalf.  The tall man with black hair made an appearance at one of my workplaces.  His name is Doug.  Doug lives close to me (in the condos just to the East of Quincy Reservoir on Quincy - across the street from the 7-11 and Big 5 Sporting Goods Store ). He's harassed my colleagues in their offices wanting my whereabouts.  He's also been caught blocking my driveway so I cannot leave the property.  He likes to grab me in public and call me Satan. 

I don't know why he'd bother me now.  He hasn't made an appearance (than I know of) since 2015.

sigh....

I'll take care of it.  I won't use a gun or a weapon or try to use the authorities.

I'll just do what I'm reputed to do.  Which is all honesty, could be nothing.

It's funny because assholes are stupid.  Stupid people get themselves in binds that harm them.  When that happens they blame the reputed witch.

See?  I get credit for hurting people even if I don't do a damn thing.

******

All this bull shit can be circumvented by standing my ground.

And the Democrats want to take guns away from us.

It's a shame they don't understand WHY we need them.

A gun would give me a fighting chance if they made it into the house.

That is the other thing. I don't think they want to hurt the girls.  I don't know what they want.  I donated everything I had in this house from my ex to make room for the contractors -so- breaking in isn't going to net them anything.

Who knows?  I never knew why they broke in all those times between 1992 and now.

Love ya,

S.

Edit (three hours later): The children mentioned the ruckus taking place at the back door.  I didn't think to check the front door.

There are some deep scratches near the keyhole of the front door. The lock is brand new.  I saw this the last time someone tried to break into the house.  That time, the damage was coupled with damage to the door jamb.

The door jamb looks great.

Those contractors did a great job installing the locks if the person couldn't get into the house.

The timing is weird.  Usually, they try to break in when no one is home.  Only once have they broken in during the middle of the night.  That was in August 1994.

All of the other incidents have been during daylight hours.

They've left harassing things for me in the middle of the night but.....breaking in?  That's a departure from their usual behavior.

I wonder what has happened.

Usually, the stalking will pick up around birthdays (kiddo has a birthday in two days) or funerals.  I'll check the obituaries.

Hugs,

S.

It's Official, Aurora COPS are the Monsters and the City Bureaucracy is EVIL

After a day of doubting my perception, I am thankful for a news story that put it all in perspective. 

The Aurora Cops are the monsters.  They give tickets willy nilly to shut up my complaining neighbors. 

They lack a basic understanding of the psychology of motivation.  The complainers are getting results and it is only emboldening them to make asinine complaints. 

Some of the tickets and threats of tickets I've endured are for LAWFUL activities. 

This is what pisses the snot out of me. 

Sadly, I'm not alone.

*****

Meet Nancy.  

She's my neighbor. 

The idiotic cop had her ticketed for ringing a doorbell. 

She has Alzheimer's. 

She takes walks numerous times a day with the support of (most) of her neighbors. 

I had no idea our cops were that money hungry.

We cannot cite solicitors for ignoring no soliciting signs.  We cannot have them ticketed for trespassing.

Why go after a little old lady who has been my neighbor for 18 years????

Uh.....

What really astounds me is that they ticket her for trespassing because she rang a doorbell -but- they wouldn't take a police report for any of the harassment I dealt with from my ex-husband's family. 

His sister broke in the house! 

Another person pretended to be with my insurance company (and I called the cops at the request of Ameriprise Insurance). 

Boy.....aren't their priorities fucked up! 

Yes, I'm cursing (in more ways than one). 

*****

Yesterday, I called our PAR officer to tell him that he was creating neighborhood monsters by citing people for things that are not illegal in order to shut up the complainers. 

I wanted to tell him that all he was doing was emboldening the assholes. 

I didn't get the chance.  

This is what I get for being complacent.  I sit on my ass and someone else gets hurt. 

No more.....

It's a shame it's been wet and rainy.  I have another neighbor who needs the hot foot treatment. 

This witch is going to do a tad bit more than bitch at this point. 

Read my neighbor's story here:

https://kdvr.com/2019/06/18/aurora-woman-with-dementia-cited-for-trespassing-after-ringing-doorbell/?fbclid=IwAR3NeK3gis40NoutD_o0HUYsjpX7forVPVfw23uatoig6DRig5DWxBGwm5k

Love, 

S.

P.S.  If the blog goes down, know that I gave up the pseudo persona of a witch and decided to put a stop to the bs in a more socially acceptable manner.  I'd prefer to work with addicts and get them clean to save people from drunk drivers

-but-

If this is where God plants me - this is where I will bloom.  

Dear Aurora Cops: Stop Feeding the Monsters -unless- You ARE the Beast

Today I am thankful for a hearty laugh and a reminder that a lack of participation in civics leads to Hell on Earth.

Now, I have to roll up my sleeves and stop slacking.

It is with a heavy heart, that I may have to call my city councilman

or maybe do a stand-up routine mocking the local government.

So....

Two years ago, a houseguest received a parking ticket for parking in front of my house.  It was wrongfully issued.  The city offered to rescind the ticket -but-

the guest lost it.

I paid up.

Aurora has a law that, rightfully, states that one cannot park within five feet of a driveway.  My neighbor believes that his yard, filled entirely with rocks (which is a violation of city code) is a driveway.  As such, my neighbor had my houseguest ticketed for being within 5' of the property line.

For some dumb reason, the cops agreed to it.

Now, this neighbor has become a parking Nazi.

If ANYONE parks in front of my house, they are treated to yelling and screaming.  He parks in front of my house but I am not allowed to do so.

One neighbor was treated to having a gun pulled on him for parking in front of MY house.

I've never seen the gun but am pissed that uneducated gun toting idiots like this are the reason I have to stand on street corners with a Gadsden flag during second amendment rallies.

This neighbor, literally, had code enforcement evict bikers to the East of my home because they had too many vehicles.  They had four.  The SAME amount as the asshole neighbor who parks in front of my home.

My asshole neighbor, the one whose entire front yard is his driveway, pushed to have the biker neighbors evicted.

The city evicted them for having too many cars and one to many people in their home.  The neighbor felt vindicated because he didn't want them parking within 5' of his property line.

So now...the asshole neighbor's shitty behavior was vindicated and acted upon TWICE.

He has since become a monster.

All that did was feed the delusion that he (and he alone) can park in front of my house.  If I park in front of my house, I'm 5' away from his faux driveway.

Now, mind you, I don't mind it when people park in front of my house.  Seriously....I had a stalker.  The cops refused to take police reports so allowing the neighbors to park in front of my house was win-win. This makes it seem like someone is always at home.  I feel that this keeps me safer.

At least it did before the violent fights over parking started erupting in my front yard.  The police refused to come out and mediate.  Imagine a tired, blind, asthmatic hypnotist coming outside in 2 degree weather to persuade a bunch of ninnies to go home.

The stalking is why I let the bikers park in front of my house before the asshole neighbor pushed to have them evicted by the city.

I can't imagine why the cops and code enforcement played along.

I miss the bikers.  They were quiet and picked up their pup's droppings.

I liked them.

*****

What I don't like is the car roulette that takes place on the street.

People are so afraid of parking in front of my house that they are inconveniencing other neighbors by parking in front of their houses.

Given that many of my neighbors are elderly - this is a problem.

I am getting work done on the house.  This guy is flipping out when the contractors park in front of my home.

Last month, I had some topsoil delivered in front of my house.  My creepy neighbor literally parked his truck on TOP of the dirt mound and spread it all over the street.

That was annoying.  I called our neighborhood resource officer.  The neighbor stopped off-roading on my garden soil enabling the contractor to put it into place.

I'm starting to get irritated.

A few days ago, a contractor left a trailer across the street.  He was not blocking any driveways, mind you, but the cops told him that they've gotten quite a few calls on it and threatened to ticket him.

Nearly $1,000 in permits - and this cop threatens someone for a lawful activity.

I called the police officer find out just how many complaints he's gotten.

I haven't heard back.

I called Neighborhood Services to find out how many complaints they've gotten.

I haven't heard back.

I'm used to being persona non grata.

I'm curious about possible harassment.  It's not a bad thing to be curious.  My neighbor across the way told me the cops were in my yard last week (before the trailer arrived).

I'm wondering why?

When it comes to parking, I told my contractor just to park in front of my home.  If my neighbor flips out.  I'll take care of it in my own special way.

I don't like being a brat - but - there are times when one has to do whatever it takes to live in peace.

*****

The moral of the story is NOT to feed neighborhood bullies.

Don't issue citations for lawful activity.

Don't evict people for something EVERYONE else on the block is doing.

Don't feed the monsters!

Unless....the cops are continuing the harassment that ensued by order of the City Manager's office in 2008.  I thought the lawsuit took care of that.

Maybe there needs to be another suit. I kinda miss hypnotizing the city's high priced lawyers. I just didn't want the taxpayers to fund them.

Maybe the city is the beast that needs to be starved?

*****
Of course, this isn't the first government oriented creepy thing to happen to me today.  I'm not sure what I can do about it.

In fact, I had two creepy things happen today.

Well, make that three.

Two are issues with State laws (maybe I'll write about those later).

Then I was being harassed while trying to buy spray paint in Aurora without a driver's license so I could repair our picnic table (apparently the neighbor is constantly complaining to code enforcement about the disrepaired items on our back patio).

 Look....I'm older than dirt.  I work at a rehab center and know the dangers of huffing.  The last thing I needed was a clerk legally mandated by local law to harass me (that poor cashier). Worse, she started to tell me about her childhood issues.  That's the last time I disclose that I am therapist who works in addiction.

The government creates far more problems than it solves. The government is nasty.  It's got the reverse Midas touch.

I wish it would keep it's nasty hands off of me.  I thought this little experiment in home improvement would cause me to trust them more.  All it has done is create more animosity and distrust.

I didn't even tell you about the lien with a government contractor!  It is resolved now - but- geesh!  This was a contractor that is currently working with the local government.

Maybe I'll write about that later, too.

I'll just say that if a government contractor (*cough * Martin Marietta * cough *) tries to screw someone like me over, what are they doing to the taxpayers with their government contracts?

All this has done was remind me about the pitfalls of trusting the government.

******
Of course, these stories always start with a minor irritation.  I've been irritated with the Aurora police department since they broke into my house without a warrant in 2008 and again in 2011.

Part of me wonders if they refused to investigate the stalking because it would reveal some of their antics, too.

They just keep getting worse and worse.

I've been very kind almost to the point of complacency.

The latest story begins with one my jobs at a rehab center in a neighboring jurisdiction.

The Aurora cops call too often, pretending to be doctors (but the beeping of their radios gives them away).  They want me to break Federal and State law by naming the patients in my facility.

No - Bleeping - Way!


Here is my standard response.  

"As an officer sworn to uphold the law, you must know that I cannot confirm or deny the name of anyone in this facility.  Nice try, though." 

Now, the first four times, this routine was cute. 

I'm tired of it. 

I doubt they know it is me that is answering the phones.  I doubt they know that I've been harassed by them numerous times in the past.

I wonder.....how much a five minute phone call costs the City of Aurora.  The cops are being paid to make these calls.  These calls are interfering with their ability to deal with crime in a realistic way. 

I know it costs my employer money to pay me.  It takes time away from patients who are in a fragile mental and physical state. 

Right now, I'm tired of their bs. 

I can't record the phone calls out of privacy concerns for my patients.  

There has to be a way to point out the waste and disgust I have with people wasting my time by lying. 

If cops lie about this shit - what else are they lying about? 

Please behave.  Yeah, you can laugh at me now.  Cops don't have to be honest.  Cities don't have to follow their own rules (yeah...I literally met another therapist whose husband was abused in the same manner as my ex by the government...so the law breaking games have yet to stop....I'll never get bored will I?).

Just know that these little irritants will add up.  They will determine the attitudes of voters should the city (or police officers) want something from the voters going forward. 

I'm just one person. 

How many of us have they pushed in this manner? 

The answer is more than they realize.

Few people ever really speak up.  They complain at the ballot box. 

*****

Here is a little advice.

Even Dirty Harry managed to stay clean.   

Don't lie (it's makes it easier to keep your story straight). 

Do your job without being a hypocrite. 

Don't feed the monsters!  Feeding the monsters just creates more work for you going forward.

*****

Oh....and I didn't call the cops when I heard blood curdling screams come out of that house because I saw silhouettes of my neighbor's wife and kids.  In the past, I've called the police when I saw a man hit a woman.  I was told, in part, that this is why they refuse to take stalking reports from me.  Apparently, when they came out the couple was no longer fighting.

The woman was my dental hygienist.  I know who the victim is.  I also know of the abuser; he is the father of her child lives two doors down. It's not my fault the police dilly dallied on their way to the scene. 

That boy is nothing compared to the creepy dude next door who acts as if the cops have his back.  If he murders his wife, the Aurora police and Code Enforcement are going to look horrible (especially since they keep giving into this jerk and citing people for things that aren't in the code while ignoring his code violations).

I truly believe that monsters like my neighbor, narcissistic monsters who love annoying women and threatening elderly men with guns are dangerous.  

The police have only fed this monster.  Mark my words, he WILL get worse.  

I've only called the police when I've witnessed domestic violence -or- when we saw an escaped convict (who was caught).   I've called to try to get a stalking report (but the Aurora cops don't take those...yet....I hear that's going to change very soon). 

That's it.

This time, I've called because I am afraid this guy is going to lose his sh!t.  He's aggressive and has little respect for anyone else's property rights.  He's going off the deep end.

He literally thinks that the city codes don't apply to him (e.g. junk vehicle and trash in his front yard) and that he can have his neighbors ticketed for lawful activity (having a guest park in front of her home more than 5' from any driveway). 

The worst part about it - well, the cops gave in to him and ticketed someone for not doing anything wrong and threatened others connected to her for not doing anything wrong.

I'm beginning to feel harassed.  It's almost as if City Hall is ignoring a 2011 legal settlement.

Prove me wrong.

Here is the deal: 

Don't reward bullies. 

Don't feed the monsters - they'll only grow larger. 

Don't annoy little old ladies or waste their time.

*****

That said, the neighbor was blasting fake country music at my house over a weekend....like a pseudo redneck.

Even I'm rednecker than him - lol.  That's a song which cracks me up.

I think it was Luke Perry, or Luke Bryan or Perry Band....I don't know.

I worked the night before and had to work that night, too.  The loud music kept me awake. 

You would be incredibly proud of me. 

I didn't even plug in my amp to play along with the crappy music.

See?

I can be nice....once in a while.

This is harassment.  There is nothing more dangerous than a short, bald narcissist who thinks the cops are on his side.

One of these days, I'll drive home and find yellow police tape around that house.

Pray I'm wrong.

It's Monday.  I should get over to city hall to get a sense of who is in charge of such chaos.

I feel a PAC coming on.  

Love ya,

S.

EDIT: As much as I hate to do it, sometimes the best solution to a problem is the easiest one.  I guess, with the waning moon, it's time for a bitch to be gone.

The Law of Attraction

The video exemplifies the current stage of my life.

I get something....

which gets bigger and bigger and bigger

until

I am completely and utterly exhausted.

I can't complain.

My house is in shambles - but, I now have a working furnace, air conditioner (never had one before), a working fridge and a working dishwasher.

This is awesome.

But, on the flip side, I also have 50 boxes to unpack.

****
I have my dream job (without the dream pay)

but, on the flip side,

I don't have as much time as I need to see hypnosis clients.

*****
A neighborhood stray adopted us.

We, in turn, adopted a stray dog that the cat is worried about.

He's a miniature poodle mix who had a urinary hernia so he's been with us three days, on the couch, recuperating from his surgery.

I'm shocked the dog and cat seem to be getting along.

*****

I would have named the dog "Tom" as in the names that turn up in the candle wax (see previous post) -but- the dog answers to "Houston" and "Henry."

We are now going through lists of male names to see if we can figure out who he was.

He doesn't respond to Spanish or French.  We are looking at English names.

We found him at an adoption event at a senior housing project. He was brought by a shelter.

The shelter was a kill shelter (one I'd like to shut down) and he looks horribly rough.  I paid the $150 fee and brought the doggo home.

They found him on May 29th, matted and filthy.  His owner didn't have a lot of time to find him.

It's very sad.  The dog needed surgery.  He's going to need some dental work, too.

I found a great vet who offered to see him Monday at no charge.  Doggo is still shivering and I'm sure the Ketamine has wore off by now.

Ketamine - uh....

I work with people who take the stuff because it doesn't show up on employment drug screens.

I've never been near an animal recovering from ketamine.

It's still sad to see them shiver.

*****


Blessings abound -

Why am I so darn tired?

I'd tell people all about it

but, I lost my phone -

somewhere

in Littleton, I think.

I'm deciding if I should trek through the foothills to find it

or just find a new cell phone carrier.

I spend so much time in parts of the state which have poor cell phone reception, I may as well not have a cell phone any longer.

Life is getting better.

When that happens, we just need better coping skills.

*****
The key with dealing with good stress,

is self-care.

So....I guess....

I'll take a long bath,

stop eating Doritos (which is pretty much all I had in the kitchen while waiting for a fridge),

and get my nails done.

The dog and the cat are in on the action, too....

we've been watching relaxing bird videos on YouTube.

Fun times.....

Love ya,

S.

Seriously?

Today I am thankful for the prankster that is the universe. 

So....

I rarely play with my witchy candles because of a certain word that seems to always show up in them.

Well, it's more of a name.

I decided that if I did a prosperity ritual enough, I may make enough money to excuse my ex, Michael, from supporting the kids (since he doesn't want to pay anything anyway).

One kiddo was diagnosed with a possibly fatal illness (my doctor thinks it is hereditary and that it killed my sister-in-law).  I need to get the kids insured. She is twenty, so she doesn't qualify for CHP+, but her parents can put her on their insurance as per Federal Law.

CO-PEP sent in a court filing condemning me from listing her as a household member when she turned nineteen because they claimed she was an adult.  She was in college.  She quit college over the issue: Now she's working trying to get health insurance.

My ex refuses to help insure ANY of his kids and claims he can't afford to help with deductibles and co-payments....so...I lit a green candle to help me find a way to pay for their insurance and medical care.

This was the result.

Now, I'm confused.  I don't know if I should post pictures of other candles with this word burned into them.  Those candles were not very elaborate.  The soot, or spent candle wax with collected on the plate, typically spelled out the word.

Here is one (I'm having trouble getting a clear shot of it.  Yes, I still have the candle.

I lit this friendship candle in 2007.  It was a pink votive candle that burned into the shape of a heart with the name "Tom" in it.  Tom contacted me about a year later.

Maybe it say's "OM"....you be the judge.

This green candle....

This one is in 3D.  It is, quite literally, the strangest one I have ever seen.

Sigh.....

Perhaps I should put my candles away for good now

Or maybe I just need glasses.


Love ya,

S.

Strange Life - Stranger Advice

Today I am reporting aspects of my family's strange life - as well as strange advice.

Because I'm so busy trying to make money to pick up the financial slack, my writing has become sloppy.  My posts have become fewer and farer between.

The first thing I am going to mention is that my ex is starting to become a "no-call, no show" with visitation.  This is part of the reason I fear that the stalking could be soon back on the horizon.

Stalking is all about control.

He shows up to things without a word and does not show up to things he's scheduled for.

The kids told me yesterday that he's asking them to agree to visitation outside of the schedule without telling me.

This is a huge RED flag.  I've asked him to tell my lawyer what his ideal visitation would look like.  I've asked for several years and he has NEVER answered that question.  

There is one other consideration - that is that kids often pit their parents against one another.  There could be more to the story.  The problem, though, is that I cannot speak his language.  Typically his communication consists of insults towards me and refusal to answer questions.

He's only cordial if he wants something (e.g. me to agree to pay for all insurance costs, medical expenses and academic fees while dropping child support 60%).

This is why I have spent thousands of dollars on legal fees so the lawyers can deal with it.  He's nicer to them.

I'm drowning in credit card debt.  I've spent far more in legal fees that he has EVER paid in child support.  Fortunately, I was awarded a judgment for most of it.

If only he'd cooperate......

****
A therapist buddy had advice -

she told me to get married.

That will be a trick.  I'm terrified to date.  The last time I tried to date, I had a third wheel stalker follow me around.

She told me that if I married, my ex and his family would leave me alone.  The stalking and harassment would end completely as, in the minds of obnoxious, backwards men, I'd be the property of a new man.

No....a marriage of convenience?

Nah, that's not my style.

Even if it were a friend, I'd have to take time to get to know him in more interesting ways.

I mean, I typically have sound foam all over the walls of my bedroom.  That could scare a guy away.

On the bright side, I'm reclaiming my home.  I am thinking about creating a studio in my basement apartment.  It's hard to think about sex in a room filled with guitars, saxophones, microphones and computers.

IF I move it into another room....maybe I'll change....

maybe.

****
Last night, at work, my musician/therapist colleague was talking about his dating adventures: one of our mutual friends (whose crushing on him hard) is rude, another is gay, another in love with someone else

and an unnamed person just keeps shooting him down (a statement he made while making little airplane sounds following by a loud "crash").

He was probably talking about me.

Fear is a scary thing.  We moved into a conversation about DBT (dialectical behavioral therapy).  I mentioned that it would have come in handy with the last guy I tried to date.  He finally revealed his Cluster B diagnosis after a horrible Facebook slander campaign and a choking attempt (because he claimed choking me would hook me into the relationship and keep me from abandoning him - something an ill-advised Man-Slut Seduction Guru teaches).    

I think my colleague finally understands my fear of dating.  He may have felt shot down but at least he wasn't writhing on the ground in prolonged pain due to the strangeness of my life.

Marriage?  That's not in the cards for me any time soon.

*****
The funny thing is that I've let myself go.  On a subconscious level, I thought adding a few more pounds would keep the men away.

It didn't.  It just caused me to wear ugly clothes.

I'm missing my kale and my exercise bike.  As I try to get back into my skinny jeans, I'll ponder that thought.  Perhaps, my previous appearance attracted the wrong kind of men to me.

****

Hope all is well in your life.

Don't get involved with vampiric turkeys, all they do is gobble up your time and energy.

Love ya,

S.