Today I am thankful for intuition.
Right now, I'm realizing that things are ramping up.
In the past, whenever I wasn't perceived as a "good", "quiet", "subservient", "girl", I would up being stalked.
Typically, the harassment begins in clusters. Much of it is not illegal but the scary stuff is.
In the past six months,
my ex has decided to visit the kids (hooray),
but used setting up the visits as a means to emotionally abuse me by calling me every name in the book and state that I'm lying about the stalking I've endured from his family since 1992 (boo),
now, he's messing around with visitation times. This I predicted. I feared being open and allowing for frequent changes to the visitation times because it would eventually lead to a situation where we are waiting around for him to show up EVERY weekend (even those times and weeks he's unscheduled to visit).
I've been a bit of a stick in the mud and have asked him to adhere to the times in the parenting agreement. He's asked for a lot of slack and I've stated that I'm more than willing to pay a lawyer to rewrite the visitation schedule to be more appealing to him.
He cuts off communication at the point when I ask what he would like put down in writing.
The kids are telling me that after each visit, he'll tell them to plan on seeing him the next weekend (even though he doesn't have visitation every week).
Now.....last Friday (when he did not have visitation) he showed up at the door demanding that the kids go with him. When they didn't answer the door, five minutes prior to 5:00 (visitation time begins at 5:00), he started "blowing up the phones" and sending a series of texts to them demanding that they open the door.
The 18 year old responded that it was the fourth Friday in June. Visitation typically takes place weeks 1, 3 and 5.
He continued to harangue her by insisting it was the fifth week and that he was entitled to see her (not a good parenting trick, especially with older kids).
I was at work at the time. The kids don't know what else to do except to go with him.
Mind you, I don't mind his visitation.
This issue is that we have lives. Children need structure. The children have school and art activities. It would be nice to know what to plan for and to ensure we are here for him. This is why I'd like it in writing (to protect us both) until such time that we can communicate without the texts that look as though they were authored by a psychopathic drunken sailor.
This comes 8 days after an attempted break-in
And 12 days after he asked me to change up the visitation schedule but refused to discuss putting it in writing.
Three weeks ago, he failed to show up for a visit and claimed that he forgot.
Twenty-five days ago, I asked if he was going to put the children on health insurance in order to comply with the court order. He stated that he could not afford it.
Part of me is thinking that the latest round of harassment is due to my asking him about health care costs.
I'm thinking of taking him to court to revisit child support after I was duped into dropping it. The state of Colorado sent me a letter claiming that my ex was a homeless alcoholic and demanded that I drop his child support. Now, that he wants visitation, I am told that he wasn't homeless and never had a substance use disorder.
I was duped.
After Friday, I wonder...…maybe he drinks? To be quite honest, I work with alcoholics. Many of whom are seemingly lucid despite blowing a 2.5 or higher.
Do I have to hang a calendar outside of my door?
Hopefully the new security cams will suffice.
Something is off. His behavior is escalating. This coupled with the attempted break-in and demands for me to switch up visitation without a paper trail is scaring the shit out of me.
I'm going to take him to court. While we are there, we can easily create a visitation plan that may suite my ex better.
I think some people just like conflict so they make it impossible to solve problems.
********
It's a shame that the contractors disconnected the security cameras. I think they kept me safe. Luckily, they put in security doors last week.
I'm proud of me - I have not lit one single black candle in nearly five years.
Now....I rethinking my stance on it.
*****
Now, there are a couple of things to mention if I wind up dead.
First, I thought it was a neighborhood issue. My contractors are stating that the cops have been called on me numerous times due to parking of third parties in front of my neighbors' houses..
The police are not exactly stating that this hasn't happened but they're not confirming it either. My local city councilman has offered to look into it (but he's busy, so....if I can solve the mystery on my own, I will).
The neighbors say they see cops outside of my home routinely. I'm getting the sense from the police department that this is NOT happening.
I'm being told that Code Enforcement has been called and visiting the property. The code enforcement guy has told me that this isn't the case. Yeah, I'm livid that they evicted nice biker dudes who kept me safe from the stalker and now I deal with a freaky guy whose Rottweiler craps on my lawn.
I'd invest in sod if I could find a polite way to stop the crap from happening.
Our code enforcement guy isn't the problem. The code is the problem. I fear saying anything that will get this guy illegally fined by the city (yes, I've met yet another person harassed in that manner in the past three weeks....man....some people suck).
The security cameras are going back up.
In the past, my in-laws have had their friends (police officers from other jurisdictions) harass my neighbors and threaten me.
I'm wondering if the cops visiting the property are NOT Aurora or Arapahoe county cops.
It could simply be another phase in the harassment.
I'll solve the mystery.
I'm trying not to hot foot anybody until I know what the heck is going on.
It's probably my ex.
What are the odds that he's starting to flip out the exact same time as my house is getting broken into?
Especially with his history of stalking.
I'm betting it's my ex.
******
Oh - there is one thing. I've noticed a man in the shadows every night between 1:00 - 3:00 am. I hear him dragging things. He sets off the motion detector light across the street.
At 3:30 this morning, he was behind my vehicle. It was parked in my driveway due to the construction equipment inside my garage. .
I'm pretty sure he's the latest tenant in the slum property next door (16567) but am unsure. The behavior is weird because he seems to be hiding from me when I go outside.
No one else in the neighborhood is complaining about a possible break-in, so I'm thinking it's my ex and his family.
It could just be a neighbor, too.
Whoever he is, he should smile. He's now on Candid Camera.
Love,
S.
Edit 5:00 pm : Well, I found fecal matter rubbed on the garage door.
It is reading like harassment, isn't it?
Since I haven't yet mentioned the poop issue to the slum lord property owner, I doubt it's the neighbor.
Damn....
Well, rumor has it that I'm a black magick witch.
Now, I won't go into my spirituality here - I'm not into black magick or anything like that
-but-
I do know my way around the left hand path.
Let's just say,
the last thing you want to give an alleged witch is your DNA.
- Do not have sex with a witch you hate.
- Do not smear shit on her house.
- Do not comb your hair in her bathroom.
- Do not spit in her drink. That includes bodily fluids - had some poor sap do that to my coffee years ago. That poor man.
- Don't touch her door handle.
- Do not so much as breathe a curse in her direction.
The only thing worse to give a witch than your DNA, is your footprint or your picture.
If you're coming to my house, play nice.
Now, I possibly have an asshole's shit, his picture and his footprint.
It's a good thing I'm not as dark as the gossips make me out to be.
This could be a one person party.
Love ya,
S.