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Eureka


 
Today I am thankful that I know what is wrong with me!

I am an empath. 

I tend to take on the behaviors of people around me. 

When I'm around politicians, I give speeches. 

When I'm around party people, I party. 

When I'm around life coaches, I'm impossibly peppy. 

When I'm around my friend, I read too much philosophy. 

When I'm around dysfunctional, violent, narcissists for long periods of time.....I can get to the point of acting like them, too! 

That was a profound realization. 

I don't think I get violent and weird.  The negativity makes me self-absorbed.  When they bully me, I tend to take them on a little too much (like running for an abusive moron's political seat). 

So...maybe if I can manage to get away from this guy completely, I can find myself again. 

I don't like myself when I'm self-absorbed.  

I thought I could share the house with him.  I can't.  I can't tolerate his energy.  I cannot tolerate his family.  I can't handle the yelling.  I can't stand the stalking.  It is killing my creativity and my energy. 

I'm thinking about bucking his control and leaving for the weekend so I can get my bearings.  I don't know where I would go, though.  I'll give it some thought. 

I've come so close to getting out of this mess.  All I need now is a traditional job.  Everything else has fallen into place.  I have a lawyer and an agreement.  I have the retainer.  All I need now is a job my stalker can't harass me at. 

Things are looking up. 

Love ya,

S. 
 

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