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My Obnoxious Neighbors

Today I am thankful for my obnoxious neighbors. 

One of them is a Private Investigator.  When people harass the holy heck out of him, I'm on it.  I give people who harass him no end of heck.  I'm a hypnotist.  I'm scary.  I can talk any idiot into and out of just about anything, if they talk to me. 

My stalkers don't talk to me.  They threaten my colleagues, friends, and family. 

The house next to mine is a rental property.  The tenants are a rag tag bunch of scary lookin' bikers.  They seem mean as heck as they'll sit on the porch cleaning their shotguns but, deep down inside, they're all a bunch of sweet southern guys. 

Two houses down, there is a huge Latino family.  The dad is teaching is boys to shoot.  I remember the day each one of those four boys was born.  Their grandmother has walked them from school without fail every school day for the past eleven years.  I love that family! 

An obnoxious elderly couple live in the house directly next door.  I was afraid of my stalker harassing them. 

My ex's family has always harassed my neighbors until we moved and didn't tell anyone where we went. 

In 2011,  my former sister-in-law found my office and she and her fiance harrassed an elderly colleague.  In our previous neighborhood, Shannon liked to menace my neighbors with a gun. 

We moved and kept the address a secret.  They hadn't started hanging out here until recently.  In fact, I hadn't known that Shannon was the woman trying to break into the house until a couple of months ago. 

I learned that she got in on June 8th. 

I'm a little freaked out by that. 

I don't fear her breaking in this house as much as I fear her bugging the elderly couple next door. 

This couple is bizarre.  They sometimes do really sweet things (like rake up my leaves when they think I'm not looking). 

Other times they do really crappy things like mow down the ajoining fence and put up an ugly fence that the city wants to tear down.  I've been able to keep the city off their backs for five years.  I'm saving up the money to help them replace it with one the code will allow -or- getting someone in politics to sign off on the code violation (which isn't very likely at this point but I'm trying anyway). 

On Thursday someone called Code Enforcement to complain about branches in our back yard next to that ugly adjoining fence. These are branches the obnoxious old man throws over the fence.  The only people who know about those are the old guy, me, or the person who mangled my back door lock a few weeks ago. 

The Code Enforcement officer couldn't get into the back yard because the person who mangled the lock actually managed to break the hinges on the fence.  He will probably have to look at the back yard on Friday, which will mean he will see that fence and my neighbors are going to be cited. 

I am worried about that.  My neighbors are elderly.  They can't afford to replace the fence.  I have an idea but won't be able to finance it until the divorce is final. 

So....this is horible timing. 

I was telling the P.I. about it.  He has a pretty good theory about what is going on.  He sees it all the time. 

He's going to be on the look out for the red truck and white car that Shannon drives when she's out here annoying me. 

I asked him to keep an eye on our elderly neighbors because I'm afraid Shannon is going to pull her gun on them. 

My P.I. friend put those worries to rest. 

I'm not afraid anymore. 

Nope....

Apparently, this obnoxious old man was a military sniper. 

He has a gun in each room of his sprawling house. 

I was incredibly relieved upon hearing that.  I literally cried tears of joy. 

If he takes care of his wife and property, I will take care of those branches. 

Wow....

Shannon is going to get the surprise of her life if she messes with the folks on my block. 

Maybe things will get better now. 

Love ya,

S. 

 

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