Motive

Today I am thankful that I have a motive for the stalking and harassment.

In 2001, I was severely injured in a car crash.  Later that year, I went to see a psychologist to deal with the psychological impact of the injury because I knew that the stress was making the pain worse. 

I saw this therapist until 2003. 

During this time, I was being stalked by my sister-in-law.  She would show up at the university I attended.  She would harass my professors.  Someone broke into our home numerous times (when I was home) but I could never prove that was her because the dog would chase her off the property before I could get up the stairs. 

I could barely walk due to my injuries.

I would get threatening phone calls from my mother-in-law.  It got so bad that I had an attorney write a cease and desist letter.  I went to high school with my mother-in-law's niece and in her messages she threatened to beat up this niece if I didn't do whatever she demanded. 

I never catered to my Mother-in-law's will.  Her demands were insane.  I was recently injured.  She wanted me to get pregnant.  I couldn't do it.  I couldn't afford to do that. 

We sent the cease and desist letter out when the person I went to high school (my mother-in-law's niece) received an unexpected visit from my mother-in-law who was threatening her because I wasn't pregnant.  My mother-in-law is lucky that her niece did not call the police. 

I would have.

I will never understand the rationale my mother-in-law used to connect her niece to my reproductive health.  

Back in 2003, the therapist asked me if my husband were raging at me me, withholding money, love, affection, and allowing his family to attack me and harass me in a bid to get me to divorce him. 

She thought that he was trying to get me to leave so that he could be the nice guy. 

I wasn't sure. 

I am now!

Fast forward, thirteen years. 

His car came home last night. 

He sat down.  He told me that he didn't want to get divorced -but- that it was the only way to keep his sister from stalking me. 

So, he is going to be a nice guy and divorce me for my own safety.   

He doesn't want to split custody; he wants me to take on all of the responsibility for the safety of the children.  

He doesn't want the house; he wants me to stay in the house his sister broke into for our own safety.

Oh, and I need to keep my last name for my own safety (no, I can't quite understand this one). 

He wants to abdicate all responsibilities and every thing (except the good car) to me. 

Oh......okay. 

I'm beginning to think that the original therapist was right. 

The more he gives me, the better of a guy he looks to be. 

Wow...just wow....

if he wanted a divorce, that's all he had to say. 

He didn't have to get his sister into the act. 

Wow.....just wow.....

The funny thing is, guess who is handling all the divorce paperwork? 

ME!!! 

I have to drag his butt to a notary in the next couple of days to keep him out of jail. 

We are certainly living one crazy life. 

Love ya,

S. 

P.S.  I should tell you about the video camera. 

My mother-in-law spread rumors that I had an abortion in June of 2001.  I have a daughter that was born on June 22 of that year. 

When my mother-in-law left that tidbit on an answering machine, my kiddo (cute as she is) started to dance and say she was a really pretty Zombie baby!!! 

To this day, that lie is repeated quite a bit.  Every once in a while, I will hear a truck running outside of the house, the sound of clicking heels approaching the doorstep, and find anti-abortion literature on my doorstep in the wee hours of the morning. I'm pretty sure my sister-in-law is behind that. The last incident was in October of 2012.

It's amazing that it stopped when the video cameras were installed.

Oh, and my neighbor no longer lets her dog crap on my front lawn either. This neighbor was one of the professors my sister-in-law harassed at the university. She hates my ex and wants him to leave me alone. I don't know why she torments me by being a passive aggressive jerk to him.

She must not know that I have to clean up the dog crap.

Ugh!!!

 I've learned two things from this

1.) Cameras are a girls best friend.

2.) Psychology professors are insane!!!

The sad part of that is that my professor would not have known about my ex's abuse if his sister hadn't run all over campus complaining about my not being barefoot and preggo all the time! 

Nothing screams abusive relationship like having an unkempt Banshee run around whining that a woman isn't under her brother's thumb. 

The funny thing about that is she always bitches to psychologists. 

My professors were all shrinks. 

My workmates were all shrinks. 

Funniest of all, the lady Shannon harassed at my last place of employment actually wrote a book about the difficulties of being an adult child enmeshed and unable to escape the clutches of a narcissistic mother!  

I kinda wish Shannon and Doug would have made an appointment with the lady they harassed.  They could have gotten an invite to the Adult Child of Narcissistist (ACON) self-help therapy group!

Little do they know that the people they harass can actually help them!!! 

Life is weird. 

I lost that office due to their antics.  I've decided to support the tax base of the city in which I live (despite the abuses).

I'm looking at renting an office from a lady who hosts meditative journeys to Ireland and Scotland. She'll be back in town over the weekend.  It's funny because when Steve and I walked by a table at the local Irish fair where a travel agent was peddling trips to Ireland, I actually began fantasizing about stealing him away to the homeland someday.  

It is weird how the things we focus on come to us. 

This is why it is always important to think happy thoughts!

I love having Steve in my life because he's always telling me to wish the best for everyone no matter how crappy they are to me. 

  

Dream big....make a plan....and take baby steps. 

Things will eventually fall into place. 

Love ya,

S.