Today I am thankful for uncertainty.
I am not sure I want to contact social services. I don't trust them. I risk jail but I don't know enough. I can write about what would cost Steve visits with his daughter if he had a surprise visit from CPS. I tried to remedy that when I was dating him but he wasn't interested.
I don't know....
The third expert I consulted asked for more details. I told him everything. I told him about their videos, some of which contained sexual themes (he shook his head in disbelief). I told him that there were no sheets on the young lady's bed (which really bothered him). I told him that her bed and room are used for storage and that there is little there that belongs to the young lady. I told him that I offered to buy her a bedroom set (comforter, sheets, pillows and such) for her birthday but was told 'no'. Her father wanted me to buy her drawing paper. I told him that I know she is being verbally abused but I do not know if it is from her father, her custodial grandparent, or both.
I told him that this man claims to work for a company that hires people convicted of child molestation and/or sexual assault. I told him that this man claims to date women in their late teens and early twenties.
I told him about the damage to the appliances and the door. I told him that the child's mother was said to be narcissistic (as was I) and she lost her parental rights due to the involvement of the county social service department. I also said that the father claimed to lose custody due to involvement with the same entity. That would be the entity I would call now.
He said that if the county has had that much involvement with the family, this family is already in their sights. It would be quite likely that any call would spark an investigation.
That means, by extension, that the moment anyone calls, be it a teacher, a neighbor, a friend, the entire family will get investigated. That investigation would start with the grandparents.
This is the forth professional who has urged me to file a report.
Truth be told, I don't have enough information.
Some agencies have an unofficial call rules, they hold off on the smaller complains and file them until they get a certain number of calls about the same household. This probably won't happen here. One call and they will respond.
In my county, child protection services won't intervene unless a police officer or medical professional calls them. Yes, I used to volunteer for my county. I originally studied to be a social worker but I got tired of families being reported for having dirty dishes in their sinks.
I don't want to be the one calling wolf.
I want to be sure before I run around disrupting a family. With all the verbal abuse that goes on in that family, I know that the minute they are investigated, the child will get an earful.
I don't trust the social workers to actually do their jobs. I fear they would just stir the pot enough to make her life a living hell.
It's like a cop that turns up to arrest a domestic abuser. The wife typically gets it worse once the perpetrator is bonded out of jail.
Sometimes the government just makes things worse.
I don't know.
This is giving me nightmares.
Every night, I have dreams of demons beating the heck out of Steve.
I wonder what that means.
Maybe it means that I was right to stay away.
Maybe his demons took control of his life.
*****
I wish I trusted the system.
I don't.
Maybe I'll tell you why later.
Love ya,
S.