Today I am thankful for black magick.
I've used it before, sparingly. It's hard for me to cast spells.
I don't know if it has to do with my paternal Christian background or the fact that spells always deviate me from my life path in ways that don't make sense.
They almost always impact me. It seems like every spell I cast screws my life up in obnoxious ways. I want to teach the mayor a lesson, I end up running for his seat. I want to teach a council person to stop being stupid and I end up helping someone win a seat he wants.
Every spell touches everything. If I fall in love a guy and cast a spell to help my neighbor's potatoes grow, the guy I love will end up moving to Idaho and end up sending me growing tips for my neighbors in our break-up email.
Spells always come back to haunt me. I don't know why. I don't understand. It is what it is.
I don't like casting spells.
I have cast spells to remove crappy people from office. I usually find myself working on the campaigns to get them out of office -or worse- being asked to run for their seat.
I have cursed bullies who threatened the lives of other people. It may be real or it may be coincidence but they always get into ugly car crashes. I don't actually curse them, per se, I just put a protection shield around the people they threaten so the negative energy goes back to the sender.
I have never once cursed a criminal.
Well, that's not true. I have cast spells to have them caught when they are annoying the community.
But, I've never cursed them to live a life of hell, be tormented by demons, or die a horrible death when their execution goes awry.
Never....
I'm thinking about it today.
I truly am.
On July 4th of last year, I sat outside a certain theater. I took a 7 year old to see a child's movie. Her siblings saw 'The Avengers', so we had an hour or so to kill outside an infamous theater. I sat in the weeds in the parking lot, letting her sip on the ICEE that I had bought.
She spilled the blood red cherry ICEE on her dress. Then the visions came.
I saw blood. I saw people packed outside the theater. I heard them wailing.
In a flash, it was gone. I turned my attention to an older man complaining that he couldn't BBQ because the fire chief went all global warming alarmist on us and banned charcoal.
I went home and blogged about not being able to cast my monthly New Moon protection spell on the city due to my inability to use charcoal outdoors.
I'm sorry.
Who knows if it would have helped?
No one will ever know.
I won't miss one ever again.
People send me prayer requests. I light candles and/or pray for every one.
I've heard of kids being cured of cancer, single fathers come back from the brink of death, and people having hard luck finding jobs finding their dream position. Last week, I prayed for an old guy wrongfully arrested, so he'd get home in time for dinner on a Friday night. I pray for justice. I pray for truth.
My fax number is actually a spell used to call Djinn. If you dial the number and make a wish, who knows what will happen. I'm not kidding. I found that in a book, five years after I signed up for phone service. My stalker used to call that number, so it rings off into oblivion now. I only use it to send faxes.
Weird, eh?
Oh, I've never done that but if you do you must light a lavender candle and incense. You also must make a significant offering to someone in need (e.g. a food bank, a charity or such). You must give until it hurts. Some stories claim that Djinn are cleaning up their karma after they were banished for failing to honor Adam. The more good they do, the better their chances of returning to their creator in the end times.
If a fairy story causes people to give to charities, that's fine by me. Give....give...give...
I'd say 90% of the time there is a positive result when I get all superstitious, except when I pray for me. I guess I'm not suited to find love or a job. Oh well...
I don't know what to do.
I'll wait until the New Moon and then I'll light a candle for truth. Last time I did that, I met a bunch of local activists at a golf course hell bent on finding the truth and sharing it with other citizens. Oooh, the city became irritated with information about corporate welfare and waste of taxpayer funds. Maybe this time I'll be more specific.
I want to know what really happened in June when the powers that be were behaving badly. Why did they torment children trying to catch a thief? I still get emails from people hurt that day. People need to vent. How in the hell did someone get the bright idea to torment children with guns? Someone needs a lobotomy.
I want to know what really happened in July when some young psychopath realized that he wasn't God's gift to the world and decided to go out in a blaze of glory before realizing that he was too chicken shit to die.
So, I'll pray for truth.
If the truth pisses me off much more, or I hear another neighbor crying about what happened in that theater, I swear I am going to wish an incredibly painful death on a youthful ahole. May the executioner slip with the needle.
I guess I finally understand the warning in Genesis about humans not being able to use magick and prophecy. It is very hard to learn how to discern anything. Power is power. It is tempting to use it for the wrong reasons. The ego is stupid and weak. I try to think about praying that food banks get food or poor people find work or that the sick get healed. There are times when I'd rather see if I can look twenty years old, win the lotto, or get a shiny new car.
There are times when I try to see the future. I rarely see enough in advance to protect anyone. When I do, I try to cast a spell.
I'll never know if my efforts work. I mean, the house smells nice and the candles make me feel romantic. It could be a lifetime of delusion or there could be something to this religious behavior of mine.
I don't know.
I do know that it scares the hell out of the neighbors and that no one in their right mind will ever date me. I'm too flippin' scary.
I guess it is fun to be scary, especially when people run around calling me "Satan".
Pagans don't believe in Satan, my dears. Seriously....that is a Christian concoction.
We believe in numerous different things but....NOT SATAN!
Love ya,
S.
Edit after reading trial testimony of an officer at the scene of a bunch of murders:
When you ask a pointed question and an a-hole smirks at you, it means he is hiding something.
Sweeties, people smirk when they want to hide the truth, when they want to get away with something, when they don't want to tell you something and when you've gotten so close to the truth that they hope you don't go any further.
Trust me, this man had help.
And, trust me, this man is NOT mentally ill in a way medication can help. He is a psychopath but that is NOT the same as insanity. I'd be surprised if he doesn't get the death penalty.
That dorky lawyer that thinks his insanity crap will play out well if he abuses physicians in court is too young to know what he is doing. He's killing his soul. Just as witches carry karma for every spell they cast, lawyers carry karma for every lie they tell.
I've been trying to clean up the karma from an idiot lawyer that let his people lie about me. He is the head honcho of the city all this happened in. I saw his death. He's still alive and kicking. He needs to keep his immune system clean to live. If he lies or lets his friends do it, he gets stressed out and his immunity falls. He ought to stop lying. But some men are dumb. There is not much you can do about that except hope they grow out of it.
I know what I'm going to do about that character that gave redheads a bad name. I'm going to curse he and those that helped him so that they can't help but brag about what they've done.
May those people come forward or die painful deaths.
If you don't catch those jack-wipes, we run the risk of having this happen all over again.
They got away with it once, why wouldn't they feel emboldened to do it again?
Remember...a smirk means that something is being hidden. Uncover it!
Love ya,
S.