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Smart-Asses



Today I am thankful for smart-asses: They make me feel better about myself.  





Steve has been making fun of me online.  So, I stopped following him.

He claims I live through the MBTI and make that self-fulfilling prophesy.  It's a guide.  He doesn't even understand how it works.  He doesn't understand Jungian psychology.  He certainly doesn't understand the concept of a shadow side.

In layman terms, our shadow side is our composite opposite.  When we are stressed out, emotional, freaked out, or in any number of negative, numbing trances - our shadows come out.

MBTI is a guide.  It is an attempt at someone charting the phenomenon of personality types.  It provides a continuum. We grow and we change.  We are different.  When we have no clue how to talk to another human being, it is a tool that can help us provide insight. 

If one wants to look at the MBTI, I am an angry INFJ.  Do I have to give my percentages?  I'm not going to take the time to retake the test and share it.  I am almost an INXJ.

The shadow side of an INFJ is an ESTP.  They break rules.  They get what they want.  They run amok.  They are hyper-sexual.  They can be greedy, nasty, volatile, raging, violent, and vile filthy creatures.

This is why we tend to take time away when we want to tear another person's head off.  I hate it when someone assumes they know what I am going through and who I am and how I should best spend my time. 

Right now, I am going through hell.  I'm going to spend my time getting out of it.

*****

In complete sarcastic assholishness, Steve had to endorse me on LinkedIn for the treatment of Anger Management and Phobias.

I am angry.  I am managing that by not tearing his head off.  I haven't killed Michael.  I haven't killed Shannon.  I never cast a "spell" to send a curse to my in-laws house.

I'm doing a good job. 

The other day, I thought about allowing Michael to stay until I got the house ready to sell.  The city offered to help us tap into our home equity to fix it up.  They just wanted information about all of the occupants.  Michael is not cooperating.  I may have to kick him out just to move this show forward.

If I sold the house, I'd share money with him.  He needs to help.  I pulled my back out a few days ago doing yard work.  UGH!  I'm typing from bed.  This sucks.

If I allowed myself to be angry, there would be hordes of sixe 5XL clothes on the lawn.

Steve criticizes me for feeling fear. 

I am living with my stalker.  Let me repeat, I am LIVING WITH MY STALKER!  I am afraid.  I have no clue what this man is capable of doing now.  I do NOT like leaving the children with him when he appears jealous that I'm seeing Steve.

I need to take a real hard look at what is going on and make sure that Michael and I are on the same page.  I can't talk to him without being ignored or yelled at.  How can one make sure she is on the same page?

When I tell him that I do not know why his sister is stalking me so I doubt my ability to put a stop to it outside of selling the house and moving, he'll start screaming about 'not being involved in it.' 

That's the tip off.  He wouldn't get defensive if he didn't do it.   I'm trying to offer him an out.  I haven't gotten a restraining order.  I haven't sent him out of the house.  I just want to stay safe.

I am afraid when I hear Michael whispering into the fax machine handset at midnight.  I think he uses that machine to call his sister.  I can't hit redial on the handset to find out who he calls. 

Why do that?  Why not use the telephone or cellphone?  UGH!!

I don't think he has a girlfriend.  I would be so flippin' relieved if he had a girlfriend.  Seriously.....


His sister always knows where and when to find me.  He must be telling her.  He made friends on Twitter with a GPS box dealer a year before I found one on my vehicle.  He only has a few Twitter friends.  It's got to be him.


He usually calls me within moments of a harassment or threatening event.

This has got to be coordinated. 

I AM AFRAID.

I have caught her trying to break into the house when the kids were home.  I have found broken locks on the doors.  I have found my garage door and back gate damaged.  Even if Shannon and the other proxies won't hit them, what if a stranger gets in the house after she beaks a lock?  This isn't normal.  I am afraid for the kids. . 

It is a rational fear.  Phobias are irrational. 

The stalking comes and goes.  I think that when I get a couple of weeks away from Michael, I'll be better.  The fear will fade with time. 

I also need a couple of weeks away from men who criticize me too much. 

I need time away from smart-asses. 

I do NOT have time for stupid shit.  I'm trying to get out of my private hell without too many casualties.

Love ya,

S. 

.  








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