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Swollen and Feverish

Today I am thankful for Benedryl, Loratadine and Ketotifen.

My face is swollen. 

I'm having trouble breathing and seeing.

Don't laugh.  I was diagnosed with asthma back in 1998.  I don't believe in drugs so I never got myself an inhaler.

Wouldn't you know it?  I lost my insurance the first of June and now I need to get an inhaler.

My breath is musical.

I should change my name to Wheezer.

Wait?  That's a band, isn't it?

Nevermind....

I think all the drugs are making my brain foggy. 

I also have a fever and am coughing a lot. 

The problem with fevers is that I start to have nightmares.

I tend to have nightmares of people I care about.

I'll wake up screaming. 

The one that woke me up this morning was of blood....just blood....

I'm hiking and seeing a beautiful scene.....

then it looks like blood is coming down over the lens covering up the scene.

I have no idea where I am in the dream.

It's a very foreboding feeling.

I did manage to see a hypnosis client today.  He's one of the freebie people.  He's fighting a terminal illness and just wants to be positive in his last days.

I don't charge for that.

I probably should.

I need angelic brownie points now.

As far as the job hunt,

I was offered the chance to interview for my last job.  It would be a temporary training gig at at 40% of the pay.  I expressed an interest but haven't heard back.  The only reason I am slightly interested is that one of my former colleagues just got hired for the position.  They need two people.  I'd love to work with her again.  She's a redhead, too. 

That would be a fun class, wouldn't it? 

Another recruiter offered me the chance to interview for the sales job I held with that company two years ago.  He did not tell me what the pay rate would be. 

I don't know.  Even though the company was sold, the same people run this organization.  One of these people is incredibly toxic.  He doesn't know what he's talking about.  I probably should avoid that place like the plague.

I had a former colleague liken it to returning to an abusive relationship.....don't do it!

I've been offered a couple of other interview opportunities through LinkedIn.  These are things I've never thought about doing (recruiting and interviewing).  I may investigate those further.

I need to feel better first.  Everything hurts.  I look like a swollen pig with a cherry mop on the top of her head.

I'm quite a sad sight.

It's a little funny.

Maybe I should take a Facebook profile picture.  I stopped posting pictures when Steve threatened to stalk me because I didn't like the abuse he was dishing out and refused to hang out with him anymore. He characterized the abuse as "tire kicking."  You DON'T kick up the tires in your relationships if you want to keep them.  How much dirt do you wind up gagging on when you do that?

Stupid is as stupid does. 

That was before I learned he was actively courting my twenty year old acquaintance.  I was trying to be there for her to help her move past a rape somehow.  He had her call me to talk about him.  She'd call to apologize for ruining my life.  She didn't ruin my life.

I trusted the wrong person.  I won't do that again.  Steve taught me that if a man says that all of his exes are crazy....he's going to say the same thing about you.

Another one of his friends is contacting me now.  I hesitate to answer.  I just don't trust that Steve isn't behind it.  He started to go to my political public speaking group after I left (even though there was one much closer to his home).  I don't want to deal with an asshat or answer to the crazy lies he told about me.

I'm a hypnotist.  I can be prone to evil at times. 

If I like an ex and he's alone when I'm unavailable, I'll hypnotize him to have more adventures and get out and date.

If I don't like someone and he forces me to talk to him- he may just wind up with a tic of some sort or another.....(cluck.....cluck)  Right now, I have absolutely no patience for people who threaten to stalk.....none....nada....zip.

He made that threat at the wrong time. 

Some people are best left alone. 

If you see a short bald guy ruffling feathers and making hen-like sounds, you know what happened.

Love ya,

S.








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