Today I am thankful that I'm a hypnotist.
So.....there is a nut job next door who is afraid of me.
He keeps his dog outside 24/7. The poor thing cries all the time. I'm afraid someone is going to call the pound and the little guy will be killed by the stupid staff at the Aurora shelter.
They may mistake the dachshund for a wolf or something.
He's the guy that keeps calling the cops on the people who park in front of my house. Another neighbor told me that he brandishes his gun at everybody who parks in front of my house.
He won't show the gun to me.
Hell, he won't even give me eye contact.
It could be my red hair.
It could be the hypnosis placards on my car.
I tried talking to him about it this evening, he ran into his garage and shut the door.
I feel so damn left out.
He's brandishing his gun at everyone else!
Why not me?
If he shows me his gun, I'll show him mine!
Maybe we can swap stories about the range.
I grew up in a religious cult.
I've been shooting guns a very, very long time.
I hate guns.
Worse that that, I hate people who misuse guns. People like that are the reason we have to fight for the second amendment.
People like that fuck up and my activist buddies have to clean up the mess.
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This guy is really hurting my feelings, threatening everyone and then hiding behind the cops.
He won't speak one word to the red-headed old lady wearing the pendulum.
Boo hoo!
I love it.....this guy thinks he's a law breaking rebel....who calls the cops on little girls for parking in front of my house.
Wow....such a rebel.
I could really mess with this guy if I wanted to......
I'm seriously thinking about putting on my ritual garb and casting a run a bad neighbor off spell.
I ran off the guy who sold him the house. That guy tried to extort money from me. He got fairly violent.
He had some thugs fighting in my front yard and got upset when I told them to simmer down.
It was a Tuesday.
The thugs didn't know that little old ladies can worship Ares; the God of war.
The little wanna be gang members in their sagging pants thought I was nuts.
I am crazy.
That's part of the fun.
The old guy left me alone.
They moved out within a two months.
It may have been the "Evil Potions for Sale" sign I hung up on my front door.....last June!
Sigh.....
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This guy does seem a tad bit unbalanced. His wife never leaves the house. It's pretty bizarre.
I don't hear him yell at her -but- with his behavior towards my girls and the elderly people on my block, I'm a little bit concerned.
The day a thirty-five year old man visits with me to tell me that he's afraid of my neighbor, it's too much.
Really.....
At first it was pretty damn funny.
I wasn't upset......until....until....my 76 year old neighbor told me that this fuck job brandished a gun at him for parking in front of his house!
This jerk thinks he owns the street.
Okay.....
Let's play a game shall we.
Let's see how quickly we'll get him to move out and on.
Then I'll behave.
I promise.
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There is something strange about people who have an external locus on control - they're superstitious.
They have to use things outside of themselves (e.g. guns) to feel safe. They victimize themselves consistently because they don't believe they can control their lives - someone or something else controls their fate, their circumstances.
It's about the black elderly guy who won't do stuff for him
Or the bitchy witchy next store with her candles in the windows
We're the reason he's pissed off.
People like that do not take any responsibility for their behavior.
It's not his fault we hate him, he just throws garbage over the fence and menaces people with guns.
He thinks he's a victim.
This guy, he's not going to be invited to any parties. No one likes someone who threatens them with guns for parking in front of their homes.
This guy has got to feel isolated.
He needs to go before someone gets shot.
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If anyone wants to be my neighbor, a house is going to go up for sale quite quickly.
Just don't show off your gun when it is shoved barrel down in your pants and you'll do fine.
I get vertigo easy. You don't want me to fall on you.
I don't know if I'm a good neighbor or not.
People often tell me, "I'm glad you're on my side."
Don't thrust a gun in my face or make me pay a $30
I hate taxes. Most of the wars I've been in have involved unfair
I wonder how many tax hikes I'll have to fight to get my $30 back from the City of Aurora.
Love ya lots,
S.
P.S. Yes, I did go to the police department to clarify why my guest got ticketed for parking in front of my house and to get ideas on how to keep this jerk from brandishing his gun.
There is some concern that there is a dangerous situation brewing.
I'll do the spells on Saturday so I can freak him out. It's not the spells that create change. It's the spectacle.
No body is going to want to live next to that.
Then, I'll stop.
I promise.
If I want to act crazy, I'll join a local drama club.
This guy.....this guy needs a show.