Skip to main content

Epiphanies

Today I am thankful for epiphanies.


I am going to try to make this as short and sweet as I possibly can. 

I think that I am in danger.

One of my in-laws contacted my ex-husband about my move out of state to get away from the stalking.

I don't know why this bugs me. 

It just does. 

He claims he hasn't spoken to them for well over a year.

I don't know. 

He swears up and down that I am in no danger.  He says that his sister  or another relative will try to approach me to ask me to stay in Colorado.  They may try to intimidate me, he says, but he knows that they will not harm me.

He thinks he can get Shannon to sign a statement saying she will leave me alone.  If he produces proof that the stalking is over, I will stay.

I don't believe that at all. 

I don't believe a signed statement will be proof that it is over.

I do believe that his sister would do far more than rough me up if she had the chance.

If I turn up blue in the next few days, it is due to this issue.  Take a look at Michael's Facebook feed.

*****

I know who my stalker really is.


I need to get away from his control.


This is why I am anxious. 


This is why I obsess over the stalking when he is near me or when I am in the house Shannon tried to break into. 


I need to find a way to get away. 
I am still trying to figure out how this happened and how this turned into a threat.  I just wanted to stop the stalking so I could get a job.  If I work, he won't have to pay alimony.  The best chance of me keeping a job is if I can get away from my stalking in-laws.


*****
I think I know why my in-laws like drama so much.  It keeps them distracted from real life.  It helps them control other people.  It is a complete waste of time.  I know what I need to do to take control now.



Love ya,


S. 









Popular posts from this blog

Stalker Proxy Phone Calls

What kind of songs do narcissistic stalkers sing?  I imagine they sing songs like this.   I am grateful now that I understand why the stalker has people call  but   wish they'd listen when I ask them not to call again.  I probably should document this somewhere.  My ex was talking to an old friend of mine from high school on a daily basis.  She is his cousin.   I had to quit talking to her when she'd ask me to plan parties and then refuse to give me the guest list saying that the attendees would only be me, her, my stalker Shannon, and my NPD mother-in-law.   She wanted me to plan interventions.   This happened with a baby shower.  It also happened with a wedding.  The in-laws put together a fake wedding trying to host an intervention to shame me and my ex into doing things for them (like quit school and give them my car).   I had to cut this so-called friend off over that in 2004....
Read more

Venus Meditations

  Today I am thankful for my new realization.  In my world, Friday is the day of love (reminds of The Cure - lol).  It's true.  Friday is the day of Venus.  Exhausted as I was after work, I went to my altar and lit a candle asking that my friend find whatever his life is lacking. Then I went upstairs and did my Friday night ritual to Aphrodite.  I lit a candle asking that I gain confidence in my ability to love.  I also ask that I recognize true love.  I was too exhausted to linger so I tried to fall asleep.  Have you been too tired to sleep?  It's horrible.  Your mind goes round and round -  you might recall things that happened recently (like the doctor telling me to be careful because I haven't hit menopause yet and I say, "not worried about it" while thinking that it's a good time to be in a sexual drought - hooray for me),  or things going on at work  (that I can hypnotize little cranky babies to sleep without sa...
Read more

Of Cowards and Chairs

Today I am thankful for cowards and chairs.   I don't understand the whole Clint Eastwood thing.  I mean, really, if you're going to do a Gestalt therapy session without a shrink, at least be brave enough put the idiot needing the scolding in the darn chair.  There are some people who would need two chairs; one for Obama and one for Bush.  Me, I'd need a whole heck of a lot of chairs.  I'd whine.  I'd complain.  I'd go after one side for stealing money from the poor and giving it to the rich.  Then I'd yell at the other one for the same thing.  Where are they for the poor?  Where are they for the huddled masses? The tired?  The needy?  Nowhere.... I mean, we give money in the expectation that it will be there for us should we need it...right? We pay our taxes.  Why do they keep rising while our benefits from them are dropping?  I'll tell you. Politician are only in it for themselves....
Read more