Today I am thankful for blogs as they provide a useful form of documentation should the crazy people in my life get crazier.
Before 2008, my blogs were boring. I wrote about sex, hypnosis and politics. I wrote about how hot it was being a vegan and watching a man eat pizza. I'd write for hours pondering why I liked watching that only to figure it out when I hit 'publish'.
That is the most vanilla thing I could never figure out.
I have an ex who likes to eat pizza when we meet. I think he found my blog.
I'd write about how hot men with beards were. Again, it would take hours of typing to actually figure out why.
That ex has a beard now.....oh, myyyyy.
Ditto for bald guys.
I wrote about the perils of aging and how driving on the interstate at night reminds me of the star field seen in the Peter Davidson's Doctor Who Intro. Yeah, if I'm not paying attention, I may just see a face coming at me. It's good to be attentive.
My blog droned on and on.
Then I started getting frustrated by some chick that worked for the local government. She was a lawyer representing my spouse's boss. She'd call the house and tell me the craziest things about myself.
Her client illegally stole money from me. Her client slandered and libeled me. She'd call to say that I could not do a darn thing about it.
I did. If you know my identity, you know I gave those idiots a run for my money. I'm still not done. I want to sick a legion of demons on them.
I'm trying to get their employees unionized.
There is only one thing an alleged black magick witch fears more than demons......
unions.
Sometime around 2009, the former mayor got into the act. He kept ignoring me when I tried to alert him to the shenanigans of his employees. A city council person shared with me a memo he sent around saying that I shouldn't have a voice in politics. Two years later, his own party asked me to take a run at his seat.
Whenever I gave interviews, he'd circle the reporter and myself like a shark. Yeah, I found a way to make him care about what I had to say. I had a voice.
I blogged about that.
I documented everything. I documented the stalking, the GPS box that fell off my car, the bizarre phone calls, the cops showing up in my garage one July evening (probably to install the GPS or to investigate the man they claimed was seen messing with my vehicle), the cops banging on the door in the middle of the night and the cameraman for the city television channel chastising me for kicking the camera that he hid under a table as I dined out with fellow activists one fine Tuesday night.
If it happened, I blogged it.
There were other stalking incidents that I wrote about. The guy watching me in the diner for four hours as a married friend of the mayor talked about wanting to lick my crotch. He wasn't interested in me. I think he and his political friend were trying to catch me doing something wrong.
Thank goodness I'm a prude.
Okay, he was far too obvious for my taste. If he had only ordered a slice of pizza and forgotten to shave that day, he may have had a chance.
NOT!
Sigh....
My adventures in politics are over.
The stalking has not stopped.
In anticipation of the divorce, I took down my blog because the last thing I want is a gaggle of lawyers finding crap to annoy me with.
It was a conversation with a friend last summer that prompted me to question everything. I told him about the stalking and he started to laugh. He said that I wasn't important enough to have several stalkers and that if I were telling the truth, I needed to really examine my experiences and try to find the culprit.
It started in 1992. The last major freaky incident was in 2011 where a man hasseled me when I was leaving a pizza date with an ex who had forgotten to shave. When I laughed at the guy for calling me a devil, he went on to threaten the people in my office building. I had lent my office out to another professional that day, so I wasn't there. The person they described matched the description of the man who approached me as my ex drove off.
My ex was never one to capture the details of his surroundings. He didn't hear my obnoxious laugh mocking the stalker. Maybe he is immune to my evilness because he has learned to ignore me. He's a smart guy.
The people I think are stalking me contacted me last week by leaving a non-threatening message on the answering machine. I ignore them now.
I've known my in-laws since 1984. I started dating the man I'm married to in 1992.
I've always had trouble starting relationships as I'm always immune to the desires of men. If they want me, I never realize it until they either have their hand on my crotch or their tongue in my mouth.
The aha moments come when they've stripped me naked after years of verbal sexual play. I usually end up saying something akin to "Oh...you like me. I wish I'd have known this when you first invited me out to dinner 48 months ago."
I'm slow.
I have married friends who now have taken it upon themselves to tell me who wants me.
It's creepy.
I feel guilty for inspiring so many red blooded American men to sport blue balls.
I had no idea.
This is pertinent because back in 1992, I had no idea that the man who wanted to be my spouse was into me until his mother started leaving harassing messages on my answering machine. She'd tell me to stop f'cking him. Not only did she say this, but so did two of his maternal aunts, two of his cousins and his sister. On a daily basis, they'd fill up my answering machine with their filth.
That is how I found out he wanted me.
So, we dated.
We'd go out to dinner and members of his family would be in the same restaurant watching him. I live in a major metropolitan area. The odds are near zero that it was a coincidence.
There would be times when I'd go pick him up for dates and his family members would hop in my car and refuse to leave.
There would be times when they'd be at my home.
It was weird.
I broke it off.
It stopped for a little while.
I don't want to go into how harassing phone calls have cost me my apartments or jobs. I'll just say that when he moved in with me, the stalking escalated. I didn't consider it stalking at the time but that is exactly what it was.
His sister and cousin would drive by and report to me who I was with and what I was doing.
Then they started hasseling me at college. They'd stalk me, spread malicious gossip to my professors, and call me daily to demand that I quit. There were times they'd drive over to my home to do the same thing. They'd ruin parties screaming at me because I was in school.
I never understood this.....until today.
I was informed today that a few years prior to our getting married, my idiotic spouse told his mother that we had an agreement that he would support me while I went to college. He told her that we had agreed that he would put off college until I graduated.
We had no such agreement. I was supporting him. I paid most of the bills. I paid the rent. I bought the food. He was only responsible for the phone and the electric.
He told me that his mother was pressuring him to go to college. He wasn't ready, so he said the noblest thing that he could think of. He lied when he told her that he was supporting me through college at the expense of his own education.
It wasn't true. No wonder they hate me! No wonder they accuse me of controlling him!
The truth is that I supported him through his BA program!! I even did some of his psych homework and edited his papers.
I'm so flippin' pissed.
He said that this corresponded with them harassing me over money. Until we had to ask them stop harassing me at my home, there were times when his mother would get incredibly violent while claiming that I was making her son pay for everything. She claimed that I was using him for money. He said that when he finally told her that I was paying for everything, his sister started demanding that he sign his paychecks over to her.
Like a dolt, he signed his paychecks over to his family!!
When I stopped working, they stopped asking for money. I stopped working due to abuse that I endured from him.
This is all so very sordid.
I had no idea about this until recently. I found out about him giving her money last year. I had no idea why they thought he had money to spare because I was paying for everything.
He married me and controlled me thinking their demand for cash would stop. He quit paying it. They became hostile.
Oh, crap......I took away their money bag.
I think this explains the stalking. This explains the phone calls claiming that I "owe" them. This explains the phone calls claiming that I am responsible for taking care of his parents in their old age.
They had planned on him supplementing their income!
I had no idea.
I think I found their motive. When they retired, the stalking picked up. Maybe this is why?
I don't know.
I haven't thought too much about how this fits in with his financial control, abuse and their behavior. It's going to take awhile to sink in.
I did realize today that he was talking smack about me to others. I figured he was bad-mouthing me to his work-wife (the crazy chicky at the city who threatened to audit me if I so much as started a garage band in the city). I guess he's been doing that all along.
He doesn't understand.
I want to get the stalking straightened out. He's created such a financial mess that I'm going to have to get an income to fix it. I'm terrified that the stalking will pick up again should I go back to work.
If his sister, cousin or whoever he has enlisted to stalk me gets caught, he's probably going to get arrested also.
I can't wait until I can find a way to get the heck out of here.
My mentor had some excellent advice for me today.
I'm supposed to consider the possibility of moving out of the country.
It may happen.
Darn....
I'm going to document this in case it escalates, as boring as this is.
I don't know if I told you the story about his mother's phone harassment and why she is the crazy grandma. I probably should....
Years ago, my mother-in-law found out that I went to the Ob-Gyn. While I was driving home, she left a threatening message claiming that I murdered her grandchildren. She said that if I didn't call her back immediately, she would beat up someone I went to high school with. I wish I were joking. This call led me to hire an attorney to write a cease and desist letter. I found out later that she actually did drive to this person's house to harass her. Why she didn't call the police is beyond me.
If a crazy old lady drives to your house and tries to hit you....call the police.
That day, my daughters overheard my mother-in-law's claim that I murdered them as she left her threatening rant on the home answering machine. To this day, they claim that their crazy grandma thinks they are zombies because she thinks I murdered them.
They are the prettiest zombies that I've ever seen.
That makes me smile. I'm happy that they can find the fun in dysFUNctional.
Love ya,
S.