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The Comedy of Asking to Borrow a Narcissist's Car

Today I am thankful for those moments where I get confirmation that my ex has NPD.

According to the separation agreement, he was supposed to move out and split the assets by November 1st.  He didn't do that. 

In exchange for keeping the newer car with the new engine, he was supposed to get my car repaired or help me buy a newer one.  He didn't do that either. 

Over the past few days, my van has been acting up.  I'm having trouble starting it.  It stalls at lights.  The brake light comes on.  The check engine light has been on for five years. 

Today, after driving it for about a half of an hour, the smell of gas fumes overtook the cab.  I can't drive it anymore due to the fear of an explosion. 

I asked to borrow my ex's car.  He's sick.  He's not using it.  I have to pick up the kids.  I have to go to a meeting. 

One thing about people with NPD is that they will claim to have the same problems or gifts that you do. 

If you have an IQ of 140, so do they (or maybe they'll claim an IQ o 160).

If you have a million dollars, so do they.

If you have the flu and need a day off, so do they. 

I asked to borrow his car for a couple of hours and his response was

"My car is having trouble starting.  It stalls.  There is a smell of gas fumes that permeates the cab so it isn't safe to drive."

So, no I can't borrow his car because my car is fine.  His car is having issues. 

I can't drive mine.  The suspension is shot.  My ex promised to fix it.  He bought the parts and sat on them for several months.  A mechanic told me that he thinks the bolts at the manifold are broken. 
It's better to junk the car at this point. 

I'm a little pissed.  I'm not sure how to buy a car with no access to money.   

Oh, goodie!!  The kids and I are out of luck. 

That's okay.  Maybe it's time for him to move out, split the money, and honor his part of our separation agreement. 

I am kind to him.  I still scrub the stains out of his clothes.  I bleach his underwear.  I put sheets on his bed.  I cook for him.  I clean up after him.  He is spending my portion of the settlement on our living expenses.  He is expensive!! 

Why bother helping him anymore?  Why allow him to stay here?  He can't give me the slightest consideration. 

Why in the heck should I? 

He has no idea how angry I am at this very moment. 

I'm angry enough to hold him to his promises. 

He has taken my car without my permission recently.  He did it the other day.  My mistake was asking for permission.  I'm not a thief and I wasn't raised in a barn.  I ask permission.  I don't steal. 

I'm upset because I have to take public transportation in sub-zero temperatures with two very painful temporary crowns in my mouth.  The cold air makes my jaw throb. 

I'll deal with it. 

Love,

S. 

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