Well....
Today I am thankful that I'm a bitch with a guitar case.
I'm serious.
I'm scared.
My ex kicked a mouse to death.
He KICKED a MOUSE to DEATH.
I have to wonder ......am I or the kids next?
Stupid judge......letting that person live with me another sixty days.
I told on that judge
to my baby sister....
don't laugh.
She's my younger sister. She's friends with serious Democrats. We are talking a congresswoman whose mother is a domestic violence counselor.
They have a theory about me. I'm angry. I advocate for myself (cuz I'm a libertarian.... they say it makes me selfish). .I don't think they figured out that the girl who got a former secretary of state riled up when she was attorney general - is the same woman that ran for mayor of a huge town twenty five years later.
I met a secretary of state who had to wrestle my 16 year old sister from a state funded foster home bordello.
My sister claims to be friends with a Kennedy trying to get her to write a book about our lives.
That book had best be about her life.
I have to say.....
after being a psychotherapist - what my sister and I endured is fairly common. The state makes crappy parents.
It happens to a lot of foster kids.
No one wants a book about us. We're common.
Her maybe....because she's hot.
Me....not so much.
*****
I am angry.
I'm an INFJ. We can Adolph situations in the name of justice.
Hitler was an INFJ.
We have a tendency to go too far when we feel that we've been slighted.
Mohandas Ghandi was an INFJ.
They had people killed for their belief system.
Nelson Mandela was in INFJ.
Jimmy Carter is an INFJ.
Um....bad example. Carter is said to be peaceful and doesn't yell.
I don't yell. I stage whisper....and stare with intensity.
INFJs are hella scary.
I don't need to have anyone killed. Social Darwinism takes care of dorks for us.
****
There is another creepy note.
I woke up last Tuesday and found the garage door open.
Nothing was taken out of the garage.
THE KNOB ON THE GARAGE DOOR LEADING INTO THE HOUSE WAS BROKEN.
Michael says it was age. The locks are old.
I have new locks and knobs I bought months ago. I will install them when the courts tell Michael to leave.
This has happened at my office, too. I don't know if it is part of the stalking or if the cleaning staff forgot to lock up.
I didn't say anything.
If it happens again, I'm calling the cops. Maybe if I give them Starbucks gift cards, they'll take a report.
******
There were some cute things that happened yesterday.
I found out my niece plays bass, too. Her boyfriend is an artist whose mother leaves him alone for hours on end. It's better he stay with my sister than go into foster care.
I know what they're getting for Christmas.
AWESOME!
My daughter wants a bass.
I feel stupid giving away the Steinberger and the Koa Wood Peavey now.
No matter.
I know people getting rid of their guitars.
Shopping is going to be easy this year.
Since it's time to go out and spend money I don't have, I'm going to leave this blog entry short.
*****
My sister and I had an argument.
It was about whether or not I am evil.
I think I'm evil. Judges and lawmakers are ripping off poor people and putting them in danger.
It needs to stop.
Its up to me to make it stop. Seriously...if I don't...who will?
My sister said the judge could put me on a 48 hour psych hold.
Sure...whatever. Masters degree in psych.....I work with licensed therapists. It isn't going to happen.
I'm working on a plan.
Maybe if I push a law forcing judges into expensive domestic violence training that they pay for out of pocket, the good judges will they'll apply pressure on the lazy judges to do the right thing by victims.
I've written before about male victims of violence. This is not a gender issue.
Yes, most abusers are male. I think it is how society is set up. Remember that this does not make men immune to domestic violence.
A woman can divorce a man and marry an abuser. I have seen cases where the abuser will attack the first spouse and the kids. The courts will keep the kids with the woman and abuser. The father is kept out of the picture.
This happens. Judges need to open their eyes.
In my mind, domestic violence education will be good for mothers, fathers and children because judges will be forced to understand it.
Even though education is expensive, ignorance costs more.
My working plan is contacting my buddies that run psych schools and get them to force a law on the books so they can make more dough providing continuing education credits to judges.
I'm going to then tell my story to my lawmaker buddies.
My plan is subject to change at any time. If someone wants to beat me to the punch, go for it.
*******
I KNOW THAT I CANNOT BE THE ONLY PERSON LIVING THIS HELL.
I KNOW THAT MAN SITTING IN THE COURTROOM WITH ME BEAT WITHIN AN INCH OF HIS LIFE BY HIS EX'S NEW HUSBAND CAN'T BE THE ONLY ONE LIVING HIS HELL.
I'm going to fight to stop it.
Psych hold?
Threats?
Bring it.
I'm evil. I don't let people steamroll all over me for long.
Manipulative people call that evil.
I'm evil.
****
My sister said that the judges asked her to write the book. They know her very well.
She helps women escape sex work. Apparently my sister has made a name for herself.
I wonder if they've realized I'm her sister.
We're both redheads.
She's had so much cosmetic surgery, we look nothing alike. She's pretty. I'm....well....I'm me.
I wonder if they know I was the fiery kid trying to save kids from sexual abuse in foster care.
Back then, I had the same last name as my sister.
I briefly debated changing my name back.
I decided not to do that.
A asshole by any other name is still an asshole.
I'm still an asshole. They just know me by a different name then when I was seventeen and bitchy.
Different name....same intensity.
Feel the power of a woman scorned.....
How will you know when you meet me? I'll be a little to happy to see you.
When you irritate me, I'll slap the table with my thumb in perfect rhythm.
Be mindful....dear one, when I kick my legs up in the air, I'm going in for the kill.
Today, I'm putting out feelers for people who will join me in this endeavor. I need someone who likes the spotlight.
It'll happen. I've fought the system since I was seventeen.
I know what I'm doing. Old habits die hard.
See ya on the other side of hell.
Love ya,
S.