Well.....hmmmm.......
I don't know.....
I am thankful for my Libertarian buddy in Vancouver.
So......
I graduated from college in Washington State. I do a lot with the alumni association. It is like a big family. When I ran for mayor, I learned that the head of the small business association sent his kids to the same college I attended.
He was very nice to me because of it.
It was like being with family.
My friend and his wife own a Mail Box businesses. They are going to rent one to Michael, so he can contact his mother. They'll do that....if Michael follows through.
Let me explain why this may save my arse.....
*******
Nine days ago, at 11:40 a.m., Douglas V3ga sat outside my house and blocked my driveway when I left to see a client. He was in a white Dodge Ram pick-up that, I understand, is not registered to him.
I followed it to an address down the street. When I looked up the address on the voter rolls, Mr. Vega was listed as the resident. He registered to vote on October 15, 2014 and took part in the election.
I've been replaying that incident in my head quite a bit. So much stands out for me. He didn't make any of the right turns until I caught up with him (even when the road was clear). It was like....he wanted me to know it was HIM and that he lived down the street!
Weird....
*******
So, all of these years I've been confused as to who is behind the stalking.
I have always seen Shannon and her retinue of bullies do it. I've seen them watch me. They've followed me. My friends, family and colleagues describe them when they've been harassed.
So....for all intents and purposes....Shannon is the stalker. She's the one I witness breaking the law.
Shannon died on February fourth due to complications of cervical cancer. She was 42. I have a copy of the death certificate. Douglas Veg@ is listed as Shannon's fiancé.
It should be over.
Her death should have been the end of it.
The cops have always maintained that my ex-husband, Michael, is the stalker. They believe that he is the one who put the GPS device on my mini-van. They believe that he is the one who hacked my phone. They believe that he asked Shannon and her band of bullies to keep tabs on me.
Yes, he is controlling. Yes, he does things that totally betray his need to keep me under his thumb. He took my car during the marriage on days I had to work. Even after the divorce, he took my car. I just let him keep it. He spent my money AFTER the divorce. He refused to move. He used to take the kids to shop at the shopping center near Steve's house on the days I saw Steve (creepy....I know...but I wasn't aware of it at the time, so it didn't bug me). Steve lived in the boonies about an hour away from my house near a school where an infamous shooting occurred in the spring of 1999.
Yes, I have caught Michael sitting outside of venues I frequent. His former boss (the one he had the emotional affair with) claimed that she fired him for stalking me. Even a friend of the sitting mayor, took me out for coffee to point out the dark haired man watching me. The problem was that the guy sat in a high back chair. He wasn't facing me at all. All I could see was the top of his balding head.
I don't have a clue who that was. I can make assumptions. Truth be told, I do not know.
I don't know what to think. Michael doesn't harass anyone. Shannon did that.
I have a hard time thinking of him as a stalker.
I wonder, though, if they worked in tandem.
************
I called the police. They told me NOT to contact Doug or anyone connected to him. They started a new file. They took down all the information I wrote down about Doug and the truck (including the license plate). They took down his address. They alluded to scheduling a talk with him.
I called Michael and told him what happened. He claimed that he would call the police. He told me that the police told him NOT to have contact with Doug or any member of the family he thought was behind the stalking.
The cops believe that contacting people about the stalking will make it worse.
Michael claims that his mother is behind the stalking. He says that she b!tches during holiday dinners so much that other people take pity on her and do her bidding. Her bidding? Well...they collect information for her in the form of pictures and gossip that she can use to further her agenda....whatever that is.
Doug was here on March 11th, one day after my former mother-in-law's birthday.
Yes, in the past I have had someone go through my garbage. Yes, Shannon has called here claiming to have obtained pictures of my kids (so she knows what they look like). At the time, I did a lot of art on Photoshop. I was illustrating children's books and using my kids as models.
I'd take their pictures in costume....Photoshop the picture and throw the originals away.
I stopped doing that after the phone calls started. I began keeping the originals.
I asked Michael to deal with his family.
He claimed he would go over to talk to them.
Their behavior seemed to escalate.
His mother and sister would call to threaten me. They'd tell me where I was and what I was doing. I stopped answering the phone and let the answering machine pick up.
I saved the tapes.
They are in a box labeled "Toxic" hidden within a crack between my cupboards and a wall.
********
Yesterday, Michael was in town.
He works out of Portland.
I asked him to call my alumist buddy in Vancouver, Washington to get a PO Box. My friend is willing to forward Michael's mail anywhere in the world for a fee. He'll even open it and scan it, so he can get his mail right away rather than let it pile up.
This would give him the ability to get his mail. It may stop the little issue of being harassed by people connected to Michael's family.
Well.....
Michael.....
hmmmmm......
he ignored the advice of the police.
It would seem that he sent hateful messages to his mother, his brother and his cousin. He described what Doug had done. He described the surveillance tapes. He told them to write a letter, send it to MY ADDRESS, and tell me what the he!! they want from my house.
Oh no....I want this over.
He just baited them!
*********
When someone harasses you consistently and you contact them.....it teaches them to continue.
If they are harassing me to get Michael to contact them, and Michael contacts them after the 50th incident, they learn that if they rough Siegfried up 50 times, Michael will do what they want and contact them.
This is why you are supposed to ignore stalkers.
There is something else.
I do not know if I buy Michael's story.
He cannot tell me when he wrote his family about the incident. I know we had a deal. He wouldn't do that without warning me first and contacting legal counsel.
He was supposed to have an expert guide him as to what to put in the messages to make it easier for me to get a restraining order should they continue. I'll paste a link to the bottom of this post that will give examples of what one can say to further this end.
He didn't do the right thing. He invited my stalkers to have contact at my home!!!
Doug...well...Doug won't be hanging around too much longer. His fiancé died. He's going to want to move on. Asking him to send a letter is a heck of a lot different than asking his extended family to bombard me with requests.
I have lived this hell for twenty-three years. They will bombard me with requests.
I am pretty darn angry.
I wonder.....why would Michael sabotage my case like that?
So.....
When he left I told him that I need to sell the house. I can't take it anymore.
He's upset with me.
Sometimes, though, the only way to stop stalkers is to move far away.
This is where I am.
Michael gets to move.
I am expected to stay here.
I am expected to put up with his psycho family.
I can't do it.
It is high time to think about what needs to happen to stay safe.
Love ya,
S.
P.S. This is a link to an excellent stalking resource. It even has samples of No Contact Statements that one can use to document that the other party is to leave you alone. The wording has to be exact. The statement has to be saved. It comes in handy when it is time for a restraining order.
https://www.victimsofcrime.org/docs/src/stalking-a-handbook-for-victims.pdf?sfvrsn=2